THE SIGNIFICANCE OF THE INDEPENDENT AFFILIATES
Recent UUA Board actions in regard to the independent affiliates of the UUA were a lively topic of informal discussion at the 2007 GA in Portland. Information from several sources is summarized here, including especially the Board activity reported in the UUA Annual Reports 2007 and www.uuworld.org reports. This topic will be revisited by the UUA Board at its October 2007 meeting.
A “Congregations Come First “ initiative proposed by a team under moderator Gini Courter aims “to explore ways to remove organizational obstacles to congregational health and vitality”. One of these obstacles was considered to be “that our congregations are not served by Independent Affiliates operating in isolation or being an alternative for congregational life” (both quotes are from Annual Reports 2007, pp.2-3), so they are all forced to reapply for their status. The letter which was sent announcing this move to the leadership of the Independent Affiliates of the UUA by Paul Rickter as UUA secretary can be found at http://www.uua.org/aboutus/governance/boardtrustees/letters/26969.shtml ; it makes clear that from the first the intent was to withhold independent affiliate status from many of the existing organizations. After the decision that Independent Affiliates must reapply for that status, the Board discussed conversations with organizations which wish to (re-)affiliate with the UUA.
The significance of the Independent Affiliates controversy is not obvious at first. To portray their role schematically, let us consider the external organization of the UUA as a vertical branching diagram, in which branching takes place from a node at the top of the diagram, representing 25 Beacon St. The first branching is from the central office to the districts. The second branching under each district divides it into congregations (in most places the significance of cluster organization is so limited that clusters are ignored here). Under each congregation there is a final branching for individuals. The main information flow is vertical; in fact, it is mainly downward, with much less information going from congregations to the districts and the central office than comes downward from the central office. In some senses, of course, since congregational decisions depend on available information, such information flow is closely related to control relations.
Many UU congregations function in isolation, and the involvement of most members does not go past the immediate congregation. On the other hand, for those members whose interests pertain e.g to a particular area of religion, religious philosophy, international activity or association, we can picture a second sort of connection which may be considered as horizontal. These members often are vitalized by connections to others, mostly inside but also outside the UUA, on such special topics as humanism, Christianity, Jewish heritage, Buddhism, etc. About sixty such horizontal connections exist in practice. These topics are served by what from the UUA central office point of view are known as the Independent Affiliates. Although they are not all of equal interest to everyone, they provide an important part of the theological richness and ideological diversity of modern Unitarian Universalism. They offer an affiliation between individuals which is distinct from and not controlled by the vertical central stem of information flow.
For an example of the role of the Independent Affiliates, let me take the case
of a liberal Christian who finds himself in a UU congregation in which there is little interest in that orientation. (For clarity, the present writer has never been a member of a Christian church, but speaks rather from his observations of membership patterns.) That person, cast entirely on his own resources and those of a minister if there is one, can either shift to another UU congregation which is more oriented to Judeo-Christian tradition, search with little guidance for external connections, or remain frustrated and isolated from the sort of liberal religious connections which he has probably already left a Christian congregation to search for. The existence of the Unitarian Universalist Christian Fellowship provides connections, publications, specific UUCF events at GA and elsewhere, internet connections to discussion groups and blogs, connections to UU Christian ministers, etc. The possibility of such a diverse religious and ideological network across congregations, now under attack, has been a strength of modern UUism.
Unitarian congregations have offered the community aspects of the connections inherent in the maintenance of a congregation and its activities, which might be seen as local horizontal connections, and the input of local ministers can leaven local resources by pointing members towards UUA and external resources. The more distant horizontal connections have provided religious and intellectual associations of a richness and variety which only the largest local congregations can provide. This sort of multiple connectedness is one of the more attractive aspects of UUism, in contrast to hierarchical religious groups in which the flow of decisions and doctrines is exclusively vertical and downwards. Where the more distant connections are weakened or even abolished, the religious, intellectual, and ideological connections that draw thoughtful people into association are weakened. Such weakening of the horizontal connections approximates the UUA system to a vertical hierarchical one which most members have already rejected in their decision to join a Unitarian-Univeralist congregation.
. The decision of the Board of Trustees that each of the independent affiliates loses its status and must apply for reaccreditation is not pro forma. Until renewed recognition is acquired, none of these organization is recognized by the UUA as an affiliate organization. However, those organizations already enrolled in a UUA benefit program remain enrolled through December 2008. Only two out of the seventeen applicants which had requested independent affiliate status at the April 20-22 Board meeting in Boston were granted such status, the Council of Unitarian Universalist Camps and Conferences, and the Unitarian Universalist Urban Ministry (see Jane Greer’s article in http://www.uuworld.org/news/articles/23524.shtml for May 7, 2007). On June 25, two more independent affiliates were granted affiliate status. These were DRUMM (Diverse and Revolutionary Unitarian Universalist Multicultural Ministries), and Universalist Convocations, a consortium of Universalist conventions. Associate status was granted to the UU Women’s Federation, the UU Service Committee, and the UU United Nations Office. The applications of the Partner Church Council, the UU Ministry to Earth, and the UU Small Group Ministry Network were tabled for consideration in October.
It is striking that not a single organization which focusses on religious or ideological aspects of UUism has been approved. Tom Stites notes in his report of the present status of this decision that these organizations thus lose the ability to arrange GA workshops, to gain recognition by listings in the UUA directory, and to have discounts for advertising in the UU World, as well as other benefits. See his report at http://uuworld.org/news/articles/31344.shtml A summary of these events is provided by T.S. in the fall 2007 UUWorld at p.53.
This action of the UUA threatens to weaken the independent intellectual streams in modern UUism. Some of the formerly affiliated organizations will adapt, others may die. For anyone who is not comfortable with my presentation of this conclusion, many of the above arguments, and other related ones, have been developed in a different way in a series of blog-posts by a Massachusetts minister (LT) at the address http://www.thelivelytradition.blogspot.com, in the posts with the titles (in reverse chronological order, as is usual on blogs) “One Meaning of the Independent Affiliate mystery” on June 7, “Serving Congregations?”, “It does not follow”, “More on the IA Mystery - Going a Little Deeper”, “Why the Independent Affiliate Mystery matters”, and “The Independent Affiliate Mystery”, which includes a list of the rejected organizations as of that date, and the form which organizations had to return in reapplying for independent affiliate status. On July 5, LT posted two later comments stating one hypothesis about the target in these proceedings, which indeed was suggested in private discussion at GA.
As stated in the preceding summary of Board activity, the Board’s actions have been rationalized on the ground that they will better serve congregations. This is a specious argument, as has been well argued by The Lively Tradition’s posts. Actually, the opposite is true, since the Board’s actions will make it more difficult for congregations to receive input from religiously diverse UU sources. At the present time, a weakness of the independent affiliates is that they are not well known to those who do not attend GA, so that they do not develop as extensive participation as they potentially could have. The independent affiliates are capable of providing a much richer leavening of religious diversity and information to UU congregations than has in general been available. For this reason, the existence and activity of especially the religious units among the independent affiliates should be made better known to congregations, rather than weakening their connections to the UUA.
Sunday, September 09, 2007
Thursday, September 06, 2007
Was Micheal Vick's dogfighting a cultural thing?
Whoopi Goldberg says it was.
I have no idea what to do with this information. Because I kinda believe her. I did a story on the local animal shelter in South Carolina when I was a reporter there. This being rural South Carolina, the county animal shelter was a room full of cages at the county landfill. The landfill manager was a good guy, though, and seemed to really care about the animals. He told me that people came by all the time asking if he had any pit bulls, and that a fair number of the dogs that ended up in his shelter showed signs that they had been fought.
Of course, bars that require memberships but won't sell them to black people are also a part of Michael Vick's culture, or at least the southern culture he grew up around.
It's very hard to know where to draw the line. I value kindness to domestic animals. (TheCSO and I have five of them, all from shelters except for the cat our last housemates abandoned at our house.) Our most recent acquisition, a Basset Hound named Rebecca, is a daily reminder of how abuse can scar a dog.
Even if dogfighting is a cultural practice, I feel safe in saying that it's wrong. (FWIW, a Jain is perfectly free to tell me that the fact that I eat meat and swat flies is wrong. I see distinctions there and won't necessarily agree, but I get that my view of these things isn't the only correct one.)
I do consider dogfighting wrong and at conflict with my values.
I've mentioned that I really like Jewish culture, partially because Jewish culture values a lot of the same things I value.
I never know what to do with culures that don't. Dogfighting is a glaring example. I want to be tolerant of other cultures, but I can't tolerate that.
For an even more subtle distinction, I really don't know what to think when I see cultures where education isn't valued and indeed, people who do value it and try to go to college are viewed as "trying to be white" or some such.
Mainstream upper-middle-class culture (I find it hard to call it "white culture" because there are sufficient numbers of successful people of all colors in my area that the term seems weird to me. I intuitively understood it more when I lived in the south.) does have its drawbacks. We're isolated from our neighbors, we like money, etc, etc and soforth.
But my sympathies are still with the kid of another race who likes science, or reads novels, and gets a lot of crap for it from his or her peers. Hell, it's hard enough to be the geeky kid in WHITE culture. I can't imagine what it must be like to be considered a traitor to your friends for wanting to be a doctor and being willing to do the work to get there. Historically, education has been shown to be the way to wealth and power. I want there to be people of all races who are wealthy and powerful.
The white, male faces of the Georgetown Law class of 1920-something stare out from a picture on a wall next to one of my classrooms. My classes don't look like that, and in my opinion, that's a wonderful thing.
TheCSO says that the non-white kids who took honors classes at his high school in Charlotte were shunned by their peers of the same color when they weren't being openly harassed. It depresses me to think that some of my peers in law school might have gone through that.
I don't like it, I would even say I think it's wrong. But I wonder at what point I am, albeit in my own head, imposing my culture on somebody else. I don't want to do that.
But again, my sympathies are with the geeky kids and the dogs.
It's a question I've been chewing on for a long time in various forms, and Goldberg's defense of Michael Vick has me thinking about it all over again.
CC
I have no idea what to do with this information. Because I kinda believe her. I did a story on the local animal shelter in South Carolina when I was a reporter there. This being rural South Carolina, the county animal shelter was a room full of cages at the county landfill. The landfill manager was a good guy, though, and seemed to really care about the animals. He told me that people came by all the time asking if he had any pit bulls, and that a fair number of the dogs that ended up in his shelter showed signs that they had been fought.
Of course, bars that require memberships but won't sell them to black people are also a part of Michael Vick's culture, or at least the southern culture he grew up around.
It's very hard to know where to draw the line. I value kindness to domestic animals. (TheCSO and I have five of them, all from shelters except for the cat our last housemates abandoned at our house.) Our most recent acquisition, a Basset Hound named Rebecca, is a daily reminder of how abuse can scar a dog.
Even if dogfighting is a cultural practice, I feel safe in saying that it's wrong. (FWIW, a Jain is perfectly free to tell me that the fact that I eat meat and swat flies is wrong. I see distinctions there and won't necessarily agree, but I get that my view of these things isn't the only correct one.)
I do consider dogfighting wrong and at conflict with my values.
I've mentioned that I really like Jewish culture, partially because Jewish culture values a lot of the same things I value.
I never know what to do with culures that don't. Dogfighting is a glaring example. I want to be tolerant of other cultures, but I can't tolerate that.
For an even more subtle distinction, I really don't know what to think when I see cultures where education isn't valued and indeed, people who do value it and try to go to college are viewed as "trying to be white" or some such.
Mainstream upper-middle-class culture (I find it hard to call it "white culture" because there are sufficient numbers of successful people of all colors in my area that the term seems weird to me. I intuitively understood it more when I lived in the south.) does have its drawbacks. We're isolated from our neighbors, we like money, etc, etc and soforth.
But my sympathies are still with the kid of another race who likes science, or reads novels, and gets a lot of crap for it from his or her peers. Hell, it's hard enough to be the geeky kid in WHITE culture. I can't imagine what it must be like to be considered a traitor to your friends for wanting to be a doctor and being willing to do the work to get there. Historically, education has been shown to be the way to wealth and power. I want there to be people of all races who are wealthy and powerful.
The white, male faces of the Georgetown Law class of 1920-something stare out from a picture on a wall next to one of my classrooms. My classes don't look like that, and in my opinion, that's a wonderful thing.
TheCSO says that the non-white kids who took honors classes at his high school in Charlotte were shunned by their peers of the same color when they weren't being openly harassed. It depresses me to think that some of my peers in law school might have gone through that.
I don't like it, I would even say I think it's wrong. But I wonder at what point I am, albeit in my own head, imposing my culture on somebody else. I don't want to do that.
But again, my sympathies are with the geeky kids and the dogs.
It's a question I've been chewing on for a long time in various forms, and Goldberg's defense of Michael Vick has me thinking about it all over again.
CC
Wednesday, September 05, 2007
Things I have heard repeatedly in my first week of law school
1. Learning the law is like learning a new language (Heard at least five times.)
2. Various comparisons of law school to drowning.
3. The general structure of the courts.
4. Mandantory vs. Persuasive authority.
5. Primary vs. secondary law
Sigh.
I know someday I will long for the days when law school was sort of dull.
CC
2. Various comparisons of law school to drowning.
3. The general structure of the courts.
4. Mandantory vs. Persuasive authority.
5. Primary vs. secondary law
Sigh.
I know someday I will long for the days when law school was sort of dull.
CC
Friday, August 31, 2007
Things that make CC wonder
I don't know if I should be pleased or worried that the first note I made in my property textbook was a quote from Eddie Izzard.
CC
CC
Stupid things that make CC smile
First try, kids. I swear.
You're Virginia!
Part of the old school, you like both historical sites and crazy
amusement parks. You like saying the word Commonwealth but couldn't really explain the
concept or how it applies to your life. You like five-sided shapes, five-cent pieces,
and possibly anything else having to do with the number five. Every now and then, you
discard chaff from yourself that you just don't feel you need. And since you've been
wondering... yes, there is a Santa Claus.
Take the State Quiz
at the Blue Pyramid.
Thursday, August 30, 2007
Can I get an amen?
SAPC's Accredidation was just forcibly reinstated by the courts until further notice.
Or as the update on the website puts it:
With the agreement of the parties, Federal District Court Judge Carlton Tilley of the Middle District of North Carolina today ordered St. Andrews reinstated into full membership into the Southern Association of Colleges and Schools (SACS) until further order of the court. This action by the parties and Judge Tilley means our college will continue to be accredited as the case continues in Federal Court. Importantly and as specified in the order, St. Andrews students remain eligible to receive state and federal financial aid and full credit for their course of work.
This shall remain in full force and effect until further order of the judge.
OK, back to my very busy day.
CC
Or as the update on the website puts it:
With the agreement of the parties, Federal District Court Judge Carlton Tilley of the Middle District of North Carolina today ordered St. Andrews reinstated into full membership into the Southern Association of Colleges and Schools (SACS) until further order of the court. This action by the parties and Judge Tilley means our college will continue to be accredited as the case continues in Federal Court. Importantly and as specified in the order, St. Andrews students remain eligible to receive state and federal financial aid and full credit for their course of work.
This shall remain in full force and effect until further order of the judge.
OK, back to my very busy day.
CC
Wednesday, August 29, 2007
The two things CC doesn't get about Sen. Larry Craig
I don't even understand
a. Why he was arrested. (OK, that one is more rhetorical. I guess what I really mean is "What kind of cops have nothing better to do that guard bathrooms?")
and
b. Why he pled guilty rather than making up some kind of weird but not impossible excuse. ("Those shoes looked like my campaign manager's, so I was messing with his head. I admit it wasn't a very politically correct or mature joke to play, and obviously I'm really sorry, but it was really spur of the moment silliness rather than an actual proposition."* is the first excuse to come to mind after two minutes of thought. I'm sure a political spinmeister could come up with something better.)
CC
*My experience is that homophobic humor is uncommon but not unheard of among congressional staff members working for Conservative congressmen. I can totally see some legislative assistant for some midwestern R doing this to his friend.
a. Why he was arrested. (OK, that one is more rhetorical. I guess what I really mean is "What kind of cops have nothing better to do that guard bathrooms?")
and
b. Why he pled guilty rather than making up some kind of weird but not impossible excuse. ("Those shoes looked like my campaign manager's, so I was messing with his head. I admit it wasn't a very politically correct or mature joke to play, and obviously I'm really sorry, but it was really spur of the moment silliness rather than an actual proposition."* is the first excuse to come to mind after two minutes of thought. I'm sure a political spinmeister could come up with something better.)
CC
*My experience is that homophobic humor is uncommon but not unheard of among congressional staff members working for Conservative congressmen. I can totally see some legislative assistant for some midwestern R doing this to his friend.
Tuesday, August 28, 2007
I wonder what CC, is doing, tonight
An accounting of activities from between the time I left work Monday and arrived at work Tuesday.
Drove back toward home.
Looked for nearest beauty supply store, found it closed.
Stopped at second beauty supply place looking for hair dye, they didn't have it.
Went to shopping mall.
Wandered mall aimlessly for two hours, finding no new clothes I wanted to wear. Bought embarassing number of Dead Sea Salt skin care products from Russian saleslady who would not let me do otherwise. On the upside, my hands feel nice. Downside, Sephora doesn't sell hair dye either.
Went toward home, bought rotisserie chicken for me and soup for the Sick CSO.
Crashed on bed, ate dinner, watched CSI rerun and did a bunch of data entry of wage information for one of my claimants.
Finished dinner, turned off TV, drew up settlement documents for second claimant.
Talked to LinguistFriend for an hour, mostly about law school nervousness.
Dyed hair auburn with hair dye I had around after all.
Made lame attempt to clean up bathroom, which always resembles a murder scene after I dye my hair. Will complete cleaning tonight.
Slept.
Woke up, watched episode of "Cold Case."
Did two loads of laundry.
Ate breakfast.
Got dressed.
Came to work, arriving half an hour early.
Am I justified in feeling just a bit like Jack Bauer?
CC
Drove back toward home.
Looked for nearest beauty supply store, found it closed.
Stopped at second beauty supply place looking for hair dye, they didn't have it.
Went to shopping mall.
Wandered mall aimlessly for two hours, finding no new clothes I wanted to wear. Bought embarassing number of Dead Sea Salt skin care products from Russian saleslady who would not let me do otherwise. On the upside, my hands feel nice. Downside, Sephora doesn't sell hair dye either.
Went toward home, bought rotisserie chicken for me and soup for the Sick CSO.
Crashed on bed, ate dinner, watched CSI rerun and did a bunch of data entry of wage information for one of my claimants.
Finished dinner, turned off TV, drew up settlement documents for second claimant.
Talked to LinguistFriend for an hour, mostly about law school nervousness.
Dyed hair auburn with hair dye I had around after all.
Made lame attempt to clean up bathroom, which always resembles a murder scene after I dye my hair. Will complete cleaning tonight.
Slept.
Woke up, watched episode of "Cold Case."
Did two loads of laundry.
Ate breakfast.
Got dressed.
Came to work, arriving half an hour early.
Am I justified in feeling just a bit like Jack Bauer?
CC
Monday, August 27, 2007
Saturday, August 25, 2007
A break in the heat
It hasn't helped that today has been steamy hot with the sort of heat that seems to stick to one like wet clothes.
I've hung around with my leader friends for a bit, also spent some time to myself, reading, working on a sexy piece of short fiction, trying to get some of the frustration out. (The youth were doing a ropes course all morning.)
I was buckling down to tolerate a campfire and singalong later on when a storm broke. Now the whole camp is soaked in a hard rain and the heat has faded. Something about the stormy outside has calmed my insides and I'm listening to the youth brainstorming a covenant and I'm feeling relaxed, focused and finally cool.
CC
Friday, August 24, 2007
CC has nothing to say today
The last week before law school starts has not been the R+R CC would have hoped for. First of all, it's very hot here in northern Virginia, the sort of heat that stuffs itself down your throat and makes you gag when you step outside an air conditioned building. I associate that sort of weather with New Orleans, but I've noticed it quite a few times here this summer.
Jana-who-creates is back, so life is improved on that front. I went out to lunch with them this week and as I sat down in the car, I looked over at TheGnome and said:
"Gee, you've grown! You look old enough to have a wife and kids!"
TheGnome gave me a puzzled, offended expresion, "I'm only SEVEN!" he reminded me sharply.
ZombieKid was similarly adorable, though I'm sure JwC got tired of having the "Just because CC likes the Zombie face does not mean we do it in the restaurant" talk with him.
Anyway, I'm telling you all this because I'm going on a youth retreat where I may not have signal, so I might not be posting for a bit.
Ciao,
CC
Jana-who-creates is back, so life is improved on that front. I went out to lunch with them this week and as I sat down in the car, I looked over at TheGnome and said:
"Gee, you've grown! You look old enough to have a wife and kids!"
TheGnome gave me a puzzled, offended expresion, "I'm only SEVEN!" he reminded me sharply.
ZombieKid was similarly adorable, though I'm sure JwC got tired of having the "Just because CC likes the Zombie face does not mean we do it in the restaurant" talk with him.
Anyway, I'm telling you all this because I'm going on a youth retreat where I may not have signal, so I might not be posting for a bit.
Ciao,
CC
Tuesday, August 21, 2007
As a good humanist...
I'm not one for petitionary prayer, so I'm not going to ask for that. But St. Andrews has its appeal before the Southern Association of Colleges and Schools tomorrow.
It's a good place that has made a difference in a lot of lives. They don't train people who grow up to be famous or rich, which is likely a big part of the college's financial problems. But I've seen a lot of dumbasses, potheads, rednecks and fuckups go there and turn into salesmen, elementary school teachers, nurses and non-profit workers and for a small southern school that's not a bad record.
So please, keep St. Andrews in your thoughts.
SLSW
It's a good place that has made a difference in a lot of lives. They don't train people who grow up to be famous or rich, which is likely a big part of the college's financial problems. But I've seen a lot of dumbasses, potheads, rednecks and fuckups go there and turn into salesmen, elementary school teachers, nurses and non-profit workers and for a small southern school that's not a bad record.
So please, keep St. Andrews in your thoughts.
SLSW
So political this morning
I also ran across an article about how the Obama girl video confused Barak Obama's six year old daughter. When asked about the video, Obama said "I guess it's too much to ask, but you do wish people would think about what impact their actions have on kids and families"
I went to elementary school with Dan Quayle's daughter Corinne. THAT was a family nobody gave a shit about, and the Obama girl video is so mild by comparison.
Seriously, Obama, suck it up, and don't let your six-year-old watch TV unsupervised.
CC
I went to elementary school with Dan Quayle's daughter Corinne. THAT was a family nobody gave a shit about, and the Obama girl video is so mild by comparison.
Seriously, Obama, suck it up, and don't let your six-year-old watch TV unsupervised.
CC
Paging Micheal Moore...
Buried lede of an article about the Canadian Quintuplets
The Jepps drove 325 miles to Great Falls for the births because hospitals in Calgary were at capacity, Key said.
That the family had to drive to (population: 56,690) Great Falls, Montana because all of the hospitals in (population: 1,019,942) Calgary, Alberta were full does not make me excited about Canada's much-praised nationalized healthcare.
To me it begs the question, if we were to get nationalized healthcare, where would the Canadians go when they REALLY needed something...
CC
The Jepps drove 325 miles to Great Falls for the births because hospitals in Calgary were at capacity, Key said.
That the family had to drive to (population: 56,690) Great Falls, Montana because all of the hospitals in (population: 1,019,942) Calgary, Alberta were full does not make me excited about Canada's much-praised nationalized healthcare.
To me it begs the question, if we were to get nationalized healthcare, where would the Canadians go when they REALLY needed something...
CC
Monday, August 20, 2007
I'm really fascinated by this case
I've actually known another person who claimed to be a pedophile, but said he didn't touch the girls. I to this day think that guy was just saying it for the attention. (He seemed to say lots of different things for the attention.) Either way, he wasn't breaking any laws and while I wouldn't hire him for a babysitter, he never did anything to suggest he wasn't harmless.
But I don't even know what to root for in the case of the pedophile blogger. I'm not sure why he is choosing to express his desires they way he is, and while again, the photographing the girls in a public place is legal, I can understand how awful that must be on the parents.
I guess I still view his actions as legal, but I wonder what kind of person you have to be to make that much of a spectacle of your own perverse desires, knowing said spectacle will create pain and fear. I'd like to think that the choice this man made came down to something a little more complicated than:
"It would be fun to put this stuff all over the internet, but it would cause a lot of innocent people a lot of pain and worry that I will hurt their innocent children. Oh well, I'll go for the fun..."
But I'm having trouble seeing how it does.
Thoughts?
CC
But I don't even know what to root for in the case of the pedophile blogger. I'm not sure why he is choosing to express his desires they way he is, and while again, the photographing the girls in a public place is legal, I can understand how awful that must be on the parents.
I guess I still view his actions as legal, but I wonder what kind of person you have to be to make that much of a spectacle of your own perverse desires, knowing said spectacle will create pain and fear. I'd like to think that the choice this man made came down to something a little more complicated than:
"It would be fun to put this stuff all over the internet, but it would cause a lot of innocent people a lot of pain and worry that I will hurt their innocent children. Oh well, I'll go for the fun..."
But I'm having trouble seeing how it does.
Thoughts?
CC
That's actually more Calvin than I was expecting
Your Score: Mostly Hobbes
You are 30% Calvin and 70% Hobbes
You've got elements of both Calvin and Hobbes, but over all, your sensible side wins out over your wild streak, and you tend toward the tiger. As the picture below indicates, the head is the first place that people usually turn to the darkside (i.e. Calvin): symptoms include irresponsible behavior and crazy ideas. You're liable to both. But beneath that you have a heart, a sensitive side, and this more often than not carries the day.
| Link: The Calvin Or Hobbes Test written by gwendolynbooks on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the The Dating Persona Test |
I have no idea how I have become the one who is usually pretty grounded in many of my friendships. But I have.
CC
Wednesday, August 15, 2007
TheCSO answers the interview meme
1) what do you want to learn more about, but haven't had the time?
Art, and how to create it. Also horseback riding, which I haven't had a chance to do since college.
2) would you rather jump off a building yourself or push someone else off?
Jump. I've tried, actually, but I don't have the guts.
3) when your computer auto-updates and asks you to restart, do you do it right away or do you click 'later' a couple times first?
I click Later, often until it MAKES me reboot.
4) if you could plant one idea in everybody's head, what would it be?
Be decent to each other.
5) if there were a zombie apocalypse tomorrow and you slept through it, where would you go?
If I was the ONLY survivor? I don't know. Probably go wander around a museum for a while, then completely fall apart mentally. If there were others, I'm sure we'd figure something out. I've thought this through pretty thoroughly, actually, and I'm certainly the right kind of tinkering fix-it person that a postapocalyptic society would have desperate need of. This does produce the occasional Walter Mitty-esque flight of fantasy. Well, maybe more than occasional.
Art, and how to create it. Also horseback riding, which I haven't had a chance to do since college.
2) would you rather jump off a building yourself or push someone else off?
Jump. I've tried, actually, but I don't have the guts.
3) when your computer auto-updates and asks you to restart, do you do it right away or do you click 'later' a couple times first?
I click Later, often until it MAKES me reboot.
4) if you could plant one idea in everybody's head, what would it be?
Be decent to each other.
5) if there were a zombie apocalypse tomorrow and you slept through it, where would you go?
If I was the ONLY survivor? I don't know. Probably go wander around a museum for a while, then completely fall apart mentally. If there were others, I'm sure we'd figure something out. I've thought this through pretty thoroughly, actually, and I'm certainly the right kind of tinkering fix-it person that a postapocalyptic society would have desperate need of. This does produce the occasional Walter Mitty-esque flight of fantasy. Well, maybe more than occasional.
Tuesday, August 14, 2007
Interview Meme!
1. Leave me a casual comment of no particular significance, like a lyric to your current favorite song, your favorite kind of sandwich, or maybe your favorite game. Any remark, meaningless or not.
2. I will respond by asking you five personal questions so I can get to know you better.
3. Update your LJ with the answers to the questions.
4. Include this explanation and offer to ask someone else in your own post.
5. When others respond with a desultory comment, you will ask them five questions.
Here's my response to the questions I was asked by Fishy
1) do you talk to objects that you work with (when other people might hear you)
Yes, most often my printer, who sometimes has to be coaxed to do his job.
2) what do you want to have done before you die?
My friend Katy-the-Wise says that the meaning of life is to figure out what’s important and work to preserve and promote those things. (Paraphrased)
That sounds good to me.
3) what do you do to keep your mind flexible?
Blog memes? Seriously, I read a lot and I find myself trying to figure things out. I have a pretty analytical approach to life anyway, so lack of thinking is rarely my problem. I’m always analyzing situations and trying to figure out why people think and feel the way they do.
4) what do you like about working with the UU youth group?
One time, the kids were upstairs in the service and Jana-who-creates and I were preparing the room for youth group. An awkward teenager I don't know very well came in and was talking to us because he didn't feel like going to church.
I needed a folder from the RE office upstairs.
“Hey,” I said to the youth. “If you go get the YRUU folder from the RE Office, I’ll give you a dollar and Jana will give you advice on being cool.”
“Ok,” he said. When he brought me the folder, I handed him a dollar. I expected Jana to say something like “Watch Buffy, imitate Spike” or something else silly, but she regarded him seriously and said,
“What do you need to know?”
“Well, sometimes I want to talk to someone about something, but it’s not their thing and they are interested in something else. How do I talk to them about stuff I like, and how do I talk to them if they like totally different stuff?”
She started out explaining that sometimes the secret was to connect your interest to something they like, explaining that she reads comic books and can usually find a comic book about anything that might interest anybody else. Build a bridge between your interests and something they care about.
I then explained that people loved to talk about their interests, and if you get someone else talking about something they like, they will like you more and you will probably find that what they are talking about sounds pretty interesting just because the talker is enthusiastic.
I was just screwing around when I said my friend would give the guy advice on being cool, but I think we really helped him, and in a way that I wish somebody had helped me when I was 15 or so.
That's what I like.
5) if you had to grow all your own food, would you be a vegetarian rather than raise and slaughter your own meat?
Hmm… I’m awfully lazy. I might starve. More seriously, I find myself imagining some combination of eggs, fruit trees and fish. I suck at fishing, but I think I could learn.
2. I will respond by asking you five personal questions so I can get to know you better.
3. Update your LJ with the answers to the questions.
4. Include this explanation and offer to ask someone else in your own post.
5. When others respond with a desultory comment, you will ask them five questions.
Here's my response to the questions I was asked by Fishy
1) do you talk to objects that you work with (when other people might hear you)
Yes, most often my printer, who sometimes has to be coaxed to do his job.
2) what do you want to have done before you die?
My friend Katy-the-Wise says that the meaning of life is to figure out what’s important and work to preserve and promote those things. (Paraphrased)
That sounds good to me.
3) what do you do to keep your mind flexible?
Blog memes? Seriously, I read a lot and I find myself trying to figure things out. I have a pretty analytical approach to life anyway, so lack of thinking is rarely my problem. I’m always analyzing situations and trying to figure out why people think and feel the way they do.
4) what do you like about working with the UU youth group?
One time, the kids were upstairs in the service and Jana-who-creates and I were preparing the room for youth group. An awkward teenager I don't know very well came in and was talking to us because he didn't feel like going to church.
I needed a folder from the RE office upstairs.
“Hey,” I said to the youth. “If you go get the YRUU folder from the RE Office, I’ll give you a dollar and Jana will give you advice on being cool.”
“Ok,” he said. When he brought me the folder, I handed him a dollar. I expected Jana to say something like “Watch Buffy, imitate Spike” or something else silly, but she regarded him seriously and said,
“What do you need to know?”
“Well, sometimes I want to talk to someone about something, but it’s not their thing and they are interested in something else. How do I talk to them about stuff I like, and how do I talk to them if they like totally different stuff?”
She started out explaining that sometimes the secret was to connect your interest to something they like, explaining that she reads comic books and can usually find a comic book about anything that might interest anybody else. Build a bridge between your interests and something they care about.
I then explained that people loved to talk about their interests, and if you get someone else talking about something they like, they will like you more and you will probably find that what they are talking about sounds pretty interesting just because the talker is enthusiastic.
I was just screwing around when I said my friend would give the guy advice on being cool, but I think we really helped him, and in a way that I wish somebody had helped me when I was 15 or so.
That's what I like.
5) if you had to grow all your own food, would you be a vegetarian rather than raise and slaughter your own meat?
Hmm… I’m awfully lazy. I might starve. More seriously, I find myself imagining some combination of eggs, fruit trees and fish. I suck at fishing, but I think I could learn.
Monday, August 13, 2007
CC doesn't understand people who think homosexuality is a choice
I am usually the one who explains conservative positions to my liberal friends, but the idea that “homosexuality is a choice.” confuses me.
My father is not a tolerant guy by the UU definition of the word. He told me once that he believes homosexuality to be a genetic disease and that homosexuals were to be pitied because they could never feel for one another what he and my mother felt for each other.
(Seventeen-year-old CC was tempted to respond “What? You don’t think homosexuals can be indifferent?” but refrained.)
Now to UUs, that theory sounds pretty intolerant and awful.
But as anti-gay theories go, the “yes, homosexuals are born that way, but lots of people are born with evil urges they have to control to function as a decent person. God gave them a test and they shouldn't fail it” argument at least makes sense. While there’s a whole lot of opinion mixed in, it fits the facts and is internally consistent. (As well as setting up a parallel to pedophilia that conservative types use to imply connection. My impression at least is that pedophilia is no more a choice than any other sexual attraction, the people we think of as evil are the ones who act on it.)
I don’t at all get the “homosexuality itself is a choice” idea. I’ve known a lot of proud gay people, but I’ve also known some miserable gay people who would do anything to be straight. The idea that, say, teenagers would choose to join the group with the highest adolescent suicide rate in America floors me. It simply doesn’t make sense.
I’ve known gay people who led lonely lives for fear that telling their families the truth would mean they would be shunned by everyone who cares about them. I don’t get why anyone would choose that.
It’s a pretty standard conservative tactic to simply dismiss any scientific evidence that the arguer doesn’t agree with, so I’m sure the studies showing differences in brain chemistry don’t trouble the people who came up with this theory.
Some/Most of the people who make this argument are simply stupid, the sort of people who just don't think things through*. But my understanding is that there are rational people who feel this way.
What would be the motivation for the choice? Does anyone who grew up Conservative Christian know?
CC
*I've asked the smartest social conservatives I know, none of whom read this blog, and gotten answers that were all either variations on the "genetic disease" theory or expressions of indifference to the sexual orientation itself, but desire to keep the laws as they are.
My father is not a tolerant guy by the UU definition of the word. He told me once that he believes homosexuality to be a genetic disease and that homosexuals were to be pitied because they could never feel for one another what he and my mother felt for each other.
(Seventeen-year-old CC was tempted to respond “What? You don’t think homosexuals can be indifferent?” but refrained.)
Now to UUs, that theory sounds pretty intolerant and awful.
But as anti-gay theories go, the “yes, homosexuals are born that way, but lots of people are born with evil urges they have to control to function as a decent person. God gave them a test and they shouldn't fail it” argument at least makes sense. While there’s a whole lot of opinion mixed in, it fits the facts and is internally consistent. (As well as setting up a parallel to pedophilia that conservative types use to imply connection. My impression at least is that pedophilia is no more a choice than any other sexual attraction, the people we think of as evil are the ones who act on it.)
I don’t at all get the “homosexuality itself is a choice” idea. I’ve known a lot of proud gay people, but I’ve also known some miserable gay people who would do anything to be straight. The idea that, say, teenagers would choose to join the group with the highest adolescent suicide rate in America floors me. It simply doesn’t make sense.
I’ve known gay people who led lonely lives for fear that telling their families the truth would mean they would be shunned by everyone who cares about them. I don’t get why anyone would choose that.
It’s a pretty standard conservative tactic to simply dismiss any scientific evidence that the arguer doesn’t agree with, so I’m sure the studies showing differences in brain chemistry don’t trouble the people who came up with this theory.
Some/Most of the people who make this argument are simply stupid, the sort of people who just don't think things through*. But my understanding is that there are rational people who feel this way.
What would be the motivation for the choice? Does anyone who grew up Conservative Christian know?
CC
*I've asked the smartest social conservatives I know, none of whom read this blog, and gotten answers that were all either variations on the "genetic disease" theory or expressions of indifference to the sexual orientation itself, but desire to keep the laws as they are.
A different kind of law nightmare
I have a lot of nightmares, and I rarely write about them. Recently, my nightmares have been pretty-much law school focused, a break from my usual fare of being tied to a chair while little zombie children with big teeth climb all over me and that one where someone's chasing me that I don't actually remember, but that theCSO has heard me talking in my sleep about.
My dreams have recently been pretty standard insecurity stuff. I'm trying to join some sort of law student sorority, for example, and haven't quite passed the hazing.
Last night's dream was really involved. A good friend of mine had become an insurance adjuster for workers' comp claims. I was happy to be working with her, but I was troubled by a death claim where the facts just didn't add up to the accident the company was claiming. It sounded to me like their employee had been murdered.
I told my friend, and she went around asking questions and suddenly she was dead. Her ghost was haunting me, instructing me to find her killer and solve the case. TheCSO vigorously complained that if I were going to hold down a job, go to law school AND solve a murder case, I wouldn't have any time for him. Fausto and Linguist Friend were involved, too, in a way that I don't completely recall.
"I feel like I'm sresponsible for your death," I sniffled at one point.
"Yeah," the ghost said, "You are"
Around then, the dog started making a bunch of noise.
Thank goodness.
CC
My dreams have recently been pretty standard insecurity stuff. I'm trying to join some sort of law student sorority, for example, and haven't quite passed the hazing.
Last night's dream was really involved. A good friend of mine had become an insurance adjuster for workers' comp claims. I was happy to be working with her, but I was troubled by a death claim where the facts just didn't add up to the accident the company was claiming. It sounded to me like their employee had been murdered.
I told my friend, and she went around asking questions and suddenly she was dead. Her ghost was haunting me, instructing me to find her killer and solve the case. TheCSO vigorously complained that if I were going to hold down a job, go to law school AND solve a murder case, I wouldn't have any time for him. Fausto and Linguist Friend were involved, too, in a way that I don't completely recall.
"I feel like I'm sresponsible for your death," I sniffled at one point.
"Yeah," the ghost said, "You are"
Around then, the dog started making a bunch of noise.
Thank goodness.
CC
Friday, August 10, 2007
Most over-the-top restaurant website ever
I'm meeting Sarah-the-Extrovert for dinner tonight and was looking at the restaurant's website for directions.
It's actually really nicely done and beautiful, but something about the... well... anyway, it made me laugh. Turn on your speakers.
Tell me if you react the same way.
CC
It's actually really nicely done and beautiful, but something about the... well... anyway, it made me laugh. Turn on your speakers.
Tell me if you react the same way.
CC
Thursday, August 09, 2007
The exciting news from CC's Law Firm
I have a claimant who lives on Nathan Lane.
This is the most exciting thing that has happened all day, perhaps all week.
Must be August.
CC
This is the most exciting thing that has happened all day, perhaps all week.
Must be August.
CC
Now here's an interesting lawsuit
A guy sends flowers to his mistress, instructs 1-800-flowers not to send a receipt to his house. They send him a "thank you card," his wife finds it, asks him to explain, when he can't, she calls 1-800-flowers and they fax over a copy of the order form complete with love note to the mistess.
Needless to say, husband and wife end up in divorce court.
And the husband is suing 1-800-flowers.
When CC's favorite mystery writer Margaret Maron wrote this story, it was a jewelry store thank-you note and the husband ended up dead.
I'd say this guy got off lucky...
CC
who doesn't really see this lawsuit going anywhere, though the publicity might be bad for 1-800-flowers' adultery business, which might well be considerable. Also, she thinks that people who can't come up with something like "Oh, THOSE flowers... Didn't I tell you my secretary's mother died?" on the spot have no business having affairs.
Needless to say, husband and wife end up in divorce court.
And the husband is suing 1-800-flowers.
When CC's favorite mystery writer Margaret Maron wrote this story, it was a jewelry store thank-you note and the husband ended up dead.
I'd say this guy got off lucky...
CC
who doesn't really see this lawsuit going anywhere, though the publicity might be bad for 1-800-flowers' adultery business, which might well be considerable. Also, she thinks that people who can't come up with something like "Oh, THOSE flowers... Didn't I tell you my secretary's mother died?" on the spot have no business having affairs.
Tuesday, August 07, 2007
Downtown Economics
He wanted $40.
I got him down to $30.
For a purse made of $5 worth of material.
With a label that's worth $350 if it fools people.
CC
Monday, August 06, 2007
Linguistfriend would like this quiz
Your Inner European is Russian! |
 Mysterious and exotic. You've got a great balance of danger and allure. |
Sunday, August 05, 2007
CC thinks about pain as she eats hibachi food.
I, for one, thought that was nuts.
I get the occaisional migraine headache and I imagine myself lying happily on the bed in darkness, savoring the sensation of a spike being driven in behind my eye, and I find that a little hard to believe.
Though migraine headaches strike me as the yellow jackets of the ailment world, awful and entirely without benefit, most pain does serve a purpose, essentially as the body's way of saying "hey, cut that out!"
I found myself thinking of my friend and her claim today in the hibachi restaurant. There was a family with two children over at the next grill table. Their hibachi chef began his routine the same way all Hibachi chefs begin, by slathering a thick squirt of oil across the grill and set it afire, sending
flames leaping three feet high across the grill.
The smallest kid, who was about three, let out a squeal that shook the restaurant. The older kid leaned back, but didn't make a sound.
Of course, it's possible the little kid's parents were inveterate campers or had a lot of candles around and the kid had learned to fear big fires. But I was more inclined to believe there was something instinctive there.
Some fears are certainly learned. My guess it there aren't a lot of upper middle class people who fear the police as I do.
But I think some fears are inborn.
Also, one would think that if fears came from cultural conditioning, it would work the other way and positive feelings would come from it too. To some degree, that's true. But every cultural cue exists than clowns are happy and fun, yet I've known several people, notably my sister in law, who found clowns scary as children. (Indeed, BoingBoing did a bit on Sesame Street routines that scared people as kids and got many entries.)
So that's what I'm thinking about...
CC
Saturday, August 04, 2007
Friday, August 03, 2007
On the Lingering Effects of Growing up Smith
When I saw that my block was surrounded by police cars, my first thought was for the dog.
"They always shoot the dog, you know," I thought to myself, thinking of our sweet, submissive Basset Hound and trying not to imagine her blood speckling the blue bathtub she likes to hang out in.
I'd first seen the blue lights as I drove down the hill into the little valley my house sits in.
"I wonder why there's a roadbloack right there," the CSO said, indicating the two police cars blocking the road not twenty feet past our house. We live on a corner, and I turned and drove slowly past our side yard, wishing our housemates hadn't been housesitting. I could have called them and asked them what was going on, if there were police searching the place for one of my brothers. Of course, my brothers know that I would turn either of them in if they ever came to my house to hide from the law. But the police don't know that.
I had intended to turn around in the cul-de-sac half a block down, but there was another cop car in it. There was some sort of police van at the end of the block. And a helicopter was in the sky.
We were both thinking it, but I think it was theCSO who said it,
"I wonder what Jason's done now."
We both, I think, assumed that Oliver's being tucked away in prison meant that any assault on our property by the SWAT team was Jason's doing.
I think I've mentioned this before, but having felons for brothers really sucks. A common post-law school route is to work in either the prosecutor's office or the public defender's office as both give one lots of trial experience quickly. I have trouble imagining myself in either, or maybe I could do both. When a SWAT team has thrown your mom to the ground in handcuffs, yet you know about some of the shit your brothers have gotten away with, it's hard to get up much enthusiasm for fighting for either side.
We drove past another police car and again my whole body clenched. They were the hunters, I was the prey. I was sure of it. It was gratifying that none of them followed me. They usually do. I'm a very careful driver, my friends say I "drive like Grandma." Actually, MY grandma drove like she was on fire, but then she quit driving before Jason and Oliver were much more than frequent visitors to juvie.
When you're a Smith, you drive carefully, because you've been followed by a cop watching for probable cause to stop and question you about your brothers' whereabouts. Which is not to say that when questioned, I don't tell the cops everything I know. I don't want my brothers out on the street any more than anyone else.
It's that police habit of following me that really scares me. And the house searches.
And, of course, the one person in the metro DC area whom I would feel totally comfortable calling at 11:30 at night and asking for a place to stay for a slightly irrational reason was at the beach.
I drove, taking little suburban streets, to my parents' house. No cop cars and my brother's dog was still very much alive. My folks' house smelled like cigarettes and something stale, much as usual. I started to feel better. TheChalicemom asked theCSO to fix her furnace. I drove us back using an even more convoluted route, theCSO saying comforting things the whole way.
He was right, I hadn't done anything wrong. But having the wrong brothers has always equated significant inconvenience and needless pain.
When we got back to the house, the cops were gone. The door hadn't been knocked in and there was no note from the sheriff.
I have no clue what the issue was. Maybe it will be in the paper, maybe I will never know. But Rebecca the Basset Hound is OK. And I'm lying in bed typing this as theCSO gently rubs my back. I'm hoping that the adrenalin will ebb away soon so I can sleep.
I turn to look at theCSO,
"You sure must have loved me to marry into this family."
"Yeah," he says, "You keep that in mind."
"Bite me..."
CC
"They always shoot the dog, you know," I thought to myself, thinking of our sweet, submissive Basset Hound and trying not to imagine her blood speckling the blue bathtub she likes to hang out in.
I'd first seen the blue lights as I drove down the hill into the little valley my house sits in.
"I wonder why there's a roadbloack right there," the CSO said, indicating the two police cars blocking the road not twenty feet past our house. We live on a corner, and I turned and drove slowly past our side yard, wishing our housemates hadn't been housesitting. I could have called them and asked them what was going on, if there were police searching the place for one of my brothers. Of course, my brothers know that I would turn either of them in if they ever came to my house to hide from the law. But the police don't know that.
I had intended to turn around in the cul-de-sac half a block down, but there was another cop car in it. There was some sort of police van at the end of the block. And a helicopter was in the sky.
We were both thinking it, but I think it was theCSO who said it,
"I wonder what Jason's done now."
We both, I think, assumed that Oliver's being tucked away in prison meant that any assault on our property by the SWAT team was Jason's doing.
I think I've mentioned this before, but having felons for brothers really sucks. A common post-law school route is to work in either the prosecutor's office or the public defender's office as both give one lots of trial experience quickly. I have trouble imagining myself in either, or maybe I could do both. When a SWAT team has thrown your mom to the ground in handcuffs, yet you know about some of the shit your brothers have gotten away with, it's hard to get up much enthusiasm for fighting for either side.
We drove past another police car and again my whole body clenched. They were the hunters, I was the prey. I was sure of it. It was gratifying that none of them followed me. They usually do. I'm a very careful driver, my friends say I "drive like Grandma." Actually, MY grandma drove like she was on fire, but then she quit driving before Jason and Oliver were much more than frequent visitors to juvie.
When you're a Smith, you drive carefully, because you've been followed by a cop watching for probable cause to stop and question you about your brothers' whereabouts. Which is not to say that when questioned, I don't tell the cops everything I know. I don't want my brothers out on the street any more than anyone else.
It's that police habit of following me that really scares me. And the house searches.
And, of course, the one person in the metro DC area whom I would feel totally comfortable calling at 11:30 at night and asking for a place to stay for a slightly irrational reason was at the beach.
I drove, taking little suburban streets, to my parents' house. No cop cars and my brother's dog was still very much alive. My folks' house smelled like cigarettes and something stale, much as usual. I started to feel better. TheChalicemom asked theCSO to fix her furnace. I drove us back using an even more convoluted route, theCSO saying comforting things the whole way.
He was right, I hadn't done anything wrong. But having the wrong brothers has always equated significant inconvenience and needless pain.
When we got back to the house, the cops were gone. The door hadn't been knocked in and there was no note from the sheriff.
I have no clue what the issue was. Maybe it will be in the paper, maybe I will never know. But Rebecca the Basset Hound is OK. And I'm lying in bed typing this as theCSO gently rubs my back. I'm hoping that the adrenalin will ebb away soon so I can sleep.
I turn to look at theCSO,
"You sure must have loved me to marry into this family."
"Yeah," he says, "You keep that in mind."
"Bite me..."
CC
Thursday, August 02, 2007
Lying-in-cat-pee-friendship
Jana-who-creates has been at the beach for like a week, and will remain there for several more weeks.
And I totally miss her. (FWIW, I also miss Zombie Kid and TheGnome. I have to put together a big package for TheGnome's 7th birthday, which is two weeks away. SmileyDave remains in town and theCSO and I have invited him over for a beer, but he has been sick.)
Anyway, I hadn't had a chance to call JwC until tonight. And pretty much the moment someone picked up the phone on the other end, I sat in cat pee. Like, one of the cats had peed the lovesac as a protest to some percieved injustice.
But the thing is, I really wanted to talk to my friend, and it was getting late already since she couldn't talk until ZombieKid and TheGnome were asleep. And tomorrow is Friday and TheCSO and I might go do something, and Saturdays are always a bitch to plan...
So I wiped the cat pee off of the lovesac and sat down on the floor, still rather fragrant. And then my friend started talking about minigolfing with the kids and I started talking about how restless I've been feeling and the world pretty much washed away on a tide of talk about our wacky relatives and plans to attend the Ren Faire together en masse and whether her enthusiasm made CC a Ren Faire geek.
And an hour later, we were giggling and talking about secret worries and I was offering her a job that doesn't exist yet in a law firm that hasn't heard of me and we were both getting tired and I realized I still stank.
Like, seriously.
We rang off and I got the lysol and the febreze, all the while thinking that there were few people in this world whom I would sit around smelling like cat pee to talk to just because I hadn't had the chance to hear that voice in awhile and I missed it.
May all your friendships, be cat pee friendships.
Now I'm off to take a shower...
CC
And I totally miss her. (FWIW, I also miss Zombie Kid and TheGnome. I have to put together a big package for TheGnome's 7th birthday, which is two weeks away. SmileyDave remains in town and theCSO and I have invited him over for a beer, but he has been sick.)
Anyway, I hadn't had a chance to call JwC until tonight. And pretty much the moment someone picked up the phone on the other end, I sat in cat pee. Like, one of the cats had peed the lovesac as a protest to some percieved injustice.
But the thing is, I really wanted to talk to my friend, and it was getting late already since she couldn't talk until ZombieKid and TheGnome were asleep. And tomorrow is Friday and TheCSO and I might go do something, and Saturdays are always a bitch to plan...
So I wiped the cat pee off of the lovesac and sat down on the floor, still rather fragrant. And then my friend started talking about minigolfing with the kids and I started talking about how restless I've been feeling and the world pretty much washed away on a tide of talk about our wacky relatives and plans to attend the Ren Faire together en masse and whether her enthusiasm made CC a Ren Faire geek.
And an hour later, we were giggling and talking about secret worries and I was offering her a job that doesn't exist yet in a law firm that hasn't heard of me and we were both getting tired and I realized I still stank.
Like, seriously.
We rang off and I got the lysol and the febreze, all the while thinking that there were few people in this world whom I would sit around smelling like cat pee to talk to just because I hadn't had the chance to hear that voice in awhile and I missed it.
May all your friendships, be cat pee friendships.
Now I'm off to take a shower...
CC
LinguistFriend: THE OTHER CC AND THE UUA
When I was invited to be on the board of a liberal Protestant campus ministry several years ago, I found that the two magazines most often referred to by my fellow board members were Sojourners and The Christian Century (the other CC), and I subscribed to them in order to understand better the frame of reference of my Christian board colleagues. Even after leaving that board, I have continued these journals, since I am generally sympathetic with their values
and usually find The Christian Century in particular to be a useful and well balanced source on events in the progressive Christian world.
I was dismayed to find in the News section of the current (July 24) issue of the other CC a post-Portland article under the title “Racial, multicultural tensions still beset Unitarian Universalists”, from the RNS news service. It is not possible to review it in detail, but I think that it is reasonable to say that the article puts a somewhat negative spin on a number of discussions of racial issues within the UUA, and at recent GAs. Probably the best-balanced statement cited was that of UU minister Manish Mishra, who was paraphrased as saying that “the church and its leadership are sometimes unfairly blamed for issues that affect “all of white liberal America.”“
Racism is, of course, a world-wide problem, not just an American problem, not just a liberal political or religious problem, not just a UU problem. Since I grew up in a liberal white family in an openly racist part of this country, since my father taught in a historically black college, and since my former wife and I raised an adopted black child from the age of two months, I have some awareness of this problem and I have a personal investment in racial issues. Those are the assumptions that my adopted black son invoked when he called on Father’s Day this year and thanked me for saving his life (his words) through my support of him during a hard passage in his life in recent years.
Most persons of color are better qualified by experience to speak on these issues than I am, so I usually leave statements on them to others. However, there is a higher-order issue in terms of the place of issues of race within the UUA that needs to be addressed. Although the UUA can (and I believe that it should) act and exert influence on various levels to ameliorate racial problems, a political /social topic such as race is not and cannot be the primary focus of a religious organization such as the UUA. President Sinkford has made the issue of racism a more active issue at the UUA. Sinkford, probably more than anyone else, can make this a productive discussion, but to do so he must aim at specific concrete goals and situate the discussion of these issues appropriately within the primary religious mission of the UUA
and usually find The Christian Century in particular to be a useful and well balanced source on events in the progressive Christian world.
I was dismayed to find in the News section of the current (July 24) issue of the other CC a post-Portland article under the title “Racial, multicultural tensions still beset Unitarian Universalists”, from the RNS news service. It is not possible to review it in detail, but I think that it is reasonable to say that the article puts a somewhat negative spin on a number of discussions of racial issues within the UUA, and at recent GAs. Probably the best-balanced statement cited was that of UU minister Manish Mishra, who was paraphrased as saying that “the church and its leadership are sometimes unfairly blamed for issues that affect “all of white liberal America.”“
Racism is, of course, a world-wide problem, not just an American problem, not just a liberal political or religious problem, not just a UU problem. Since I grew up in a liberal white family in an openly racist part of this country, since my father taught in a historically black college, and since my former wife and I raised an adopted black child from the age of two months, I have some awareness of this problem and I have a personal investment in racial issues. Those are the assumptions that my adopted black son invoked when he called on Father’s Day this year and thanked me for saving his life (his words) through my support of him during a hard passage in his life in recent years.
Most persons of color are better qualified by experience to speak on these issues than I am, so I usually leave statements on them to others. However, there is a higher-order issue in terms of the place of issues of race within the UUA that needs to be addressed. Although the UUA can (and I believe that it should) act and exert influence on various levels to ameliorate racial problems, a political /social topic such as race is not and cannot be the primary focus of a religious organization such as the UUA. President Sinkford has made the issue of racism a more active issue at the UUA. Sinkford, probably more than anyone else, can make this a productive discussion, but to do so he must aim at specific concrete goals and situate the discussion of these issues appropriately within the primary religious mission of the UUA
Tuesday, July 31, 2007
CC stands corrected
Awhile back, I called Poppy Z. Brite a "mediocre goth writer" and Epilonious called me on it, telling me that her new series starting with Liquor does not, in fact, suck.
He's right. It's pretty good. Ep was right I was wrong, there you go.
CC
He's right. It's pretty good. Ep was right I was wrong, there you go.
CC
Friday, July 27, 2007
The Simpsons Movie
was a two-hour Simpsons episode.
No more, no less.
It was fun, but easily my third favorite movie of the summer after Hairspray and Nancy Drew.
CC
No more, no less.
It was fun, but easily my third favorite movie of the summer after Hairspray and Nancy Drew.
CC
Thursday, July 26, 2007
A brief list of things that rocked about the new Hairspray movie
1. If they had told Christopher Walken "OK, just play the character CC is least likely to find attractive" he did a great job. And there was still something about the guy...
2. Along the same lines, Tracy Turnblad's parents were hot for each other, not it a tacky way, but in a way that felt incredibly vital and real and with a deep current of love and friendship. Loved it, and their number together was one of the best in the show.
3. Once one has seen this musical, it's very hard to remember that the original was not a musical. It works really well as one.
4. Michell Pfieffer sings a rhumba and she's all Ursala the Sea Witch about it and incredibly beautiful and evil and nifty. Like 20 minutes into the movie, I knew I would buy the soundtrack.
5. They made Penny sexy. If you had told me they made Penny sexy before I saw this movie, I would have been skeptical about it. But Amanda Bynes (Amanda Bynes? Really?) gives her character a fire that really brings something to the movie.
6. Allison Janney is in it. Her part is tiny, though she does a really good job with it. But she's Allison Janney and she rules and her character is totally different from the West Wing character and they are both totally different from her Drop Dead Gorgeous character. She plays a different role in every movie and she rocks.
7. Queen Latifah plays the same role in every movie and also rocks. And her costumes!
8. Having Tracy's mom played by John Travolta was a controversial decision, but I loved it. Having someone who can really dance play Tracy's mother was really smart and opened up the opportunity for some neat stuff.
9. This deserves a separate mention. Tracy's mom gets some dignity and some pathos and she is so much more sympathetic that Divine's version, who is more or less just a figure of fun.
10. The movie does a wonderful mix of bleeding-heart snarkiness that I really love.
11. If you don't live near me, you probably don't know this, but Baltimore totally still looks like that.
12. Like when the Simpsons makes fun of UUism, they did have fat jokes, but the only people who really made them were intolerant idiots.
13. John Waters played a flasher and I was like "That's John Waters!" and Jana who creates and I got the giggles which felt totally appropriate and cool.
14. Oh my word can the girl they got to play Tracy can sing. She was amazing.
15. We stayed to watch the credits and there were these two girls in the back dancing to the music in the background and it rocked.
This leads me to the following conclusion:
16. I'm a big dork who strongly prefers the new hairspray to the old hairspray. And I know that is completely uncool and no doubt makes me a bad GenXer, but there you go.
I'm going again Friday night with LinguistFriend, the Chalicerelative and theCSO if he's up for it.
CC
2. Along the same lines, Tracy Turnblad's parents were hot for each other, not it a tacky way, but in a way that felt incredibly vital and real and with a deep current of love and friendship. Loved it, and their number together was one of the best in the show.
3. Once one has seen this musical, it's very hard to remember that the original was not a musical. It works really well as one.
4. Michell Pfieffer sings a rhumba and she's all Ursala the Sea Witch about it and incredibly beautiful and evil and nifty. Like 20 minutes into the movie, I knew I would buy the soundtrack.
5. They made Penny sexy. If you had told me they made Penny sexy before I saw this movie, I would have been skeptical about it. But Amanda Bynes (Amanda Bynes? Really?) gives her character a fire that really brings something to the movie.
6. Allison Janney is in it. Her part is tiny, though she does a really good job with it. But she's Allison Janney and she rules and her character is totally different from the West Wing character and they are both totally different from her Drop Dead Gorgeous character. She plays a different role in every movie and she rocks.
7. Queen Latifah plays the same role in every movie and also rocks. And her costumes!
8. Having Tracy's mom played by John Travolta was a controversial decision, but I loved it. Having someone who can really dance play Tracy's mother was really smart and opened up the opportunity for some neat stuff.
9. This deserves a separate mention. Tracy's mom gets some dignity and some pathos and she is so much more sympathetic that Divine's version, who is more or less just a figure of fun.
10. The movie does a wonderful mix of bleeding-heart snarkiness that I really love.
11. If you don't live near me, you probably don't know this, but Baltimore totally still looks like that.
12. Like when the Simpsons makes fun of UUism, they did have fat jokes, but the only people who really made them were intolerant idiots.
13. John Waters played a flasher and I was like "That's John Waters!" and Jana who creates and I got the giggles which felt totally appropriate and cool.
14. Oh my word can the girl they got to play Tracy can sing. She was amazing.
15. We stayed to watch the credits and there were these two girls in the back dancing to the music in the background and it rocked.
This leads me to the following conclusion:
16. I'm a big dork who strongly prefers the new hairspray to the old hairspray. And I know that is completely uncool and no doubt makes me a bad GenXer, but there you go.
I'm going again Friday night with LinguistFriend, the Chalicerelative and theCSO if he's up for it.
CC
Wednesday, July 25, 2007
The latest Facebook group my YRUU kids are joining
"NOT MY DAUGHTER, YOU BITCH!" : Mrs. Weasley Appreciation Group
Mrs. Weasley is just really hardcore. She's an awesome cook, a good mom, really good at yelling, and she called Bellatrix Lestrange a bitch. She deserves a high five.
Can't argue with that.
CC
who came to much the same conclusion and had considered going to a Halloween party with the CSO as the Weasely parents, assuming she could get him dye his hair reddish with dye that washes out. Going around observing the Muggles in their strange holiday rituals would be worth the price of admission and CC would enjoy making wands and muggle studies books.
Monday, July 23, 2007
Linguist Friend responds to Ms. Kitty's Meme
LINGUISTFRIEND TRIES TO SAVE HIS SOUL:
I understand from Ms. Kitty’s meme-assignment that I can save my soul if I write about eight defining moments in my life at which I might have lost my soul (on some points the jury is still out), or at least I learned something from the experience.
1. In the early and mid-20th century, American aeronautical engineering benefited from the immigration of German and other Central European applied scientists. When I was in the 3rd grade, the younger son of one of them was in the same class as I was. Richard (now a military historian) gave me academic competition such that I realized that whereas earlier I had done well enough, now I had to do better than I had known I could, which was a good habit to establish early.
2. In the same period, I was introduced to the elements of music theory and piano. I quit when I realized that I would never be a good pianist. I repeated this sequence with the recorder, the classical guitar, and singing. I learned a lot about music theory, and my father made sure that I learned about musical acoustics. But eventually I realized something: never let yourself or other people nudge you to do something because you or they think you should do it. Do what is fun and you are really good at, especially if other people are not good at it.
3. In my second year of college, I took an introductory course on linguistics from a great scholar on the history of languages. But, by that time, the historical approach he practiced no longer set the model of research in his field; it had been partly replaced by models drawn from mathematics. He himself had once had to choose whether he would accept a university scholarship in math or in linguistic studies, and had chosen the latter, which he now regretted. So, in late middle age, he tried to renew his mathematical studies, which of course led him nowhere; when he retired three years later in ill health and depression, he did not live long. One has only one life, and it needs some basic continuity and consistency.
4.. Early in college, I asked our family physician to refer me to one of his East European relatives to help me to improve my spoken Russian. He introduced me to his pharmacist aunt Shalumith Schneider, the daughter of a scholarly Vilna rabbi. She gave me years of friendship and tutorial in Russian language and literature. Since her native city was a great center of Jewish scholarship (the Vilna Gaon, the Vilna edition of the Talmud), she also gave me an implicit orientation in terms of her recognition of and devotion to the value of learning.
5. When I married at age 22, it was to someone who initially seemed well matched, an agnostic (read: no interest in religion) daughter of an American diplomatic family. Thirty-one years later, she moved back across the country from LA to her native Maine, and a year after that she filed for divorce. She had borne our children, typed my doctoral dissertation, and developed a private practice in counseling in an LA suburb. But the marriage had progressively turned emotionally sterile, starting halfway through. At times I say that I have never seen a bad divorce, on the principle that once either one of the parties has left in some sense, then the sooner the legal action is finished, the sooner both parties can get on with life. But divorce may bring terrible practical situations, including the freedom to commit appalling stupidities.
6. When I wrote my doctoral dissertation, I focussed on the grammar of an ancient language that was fundamental in East European studies. Since almost all of its early manuscripts were texts translated from Greek Christian sources, to write my dissertation I had to read thousands of pages of late Greek texts. This was effectively a total immersion course in Eastern Christianity. Although this material has never been central to how I earn my living, I have never entirely left it, and it has been a perennial background factor in how I think about the world and religion. Immersion leads to absorption.
7. When the Cold War and East European studies cooled, I shifted my orientation to the basic study of speech on a physiological level. This entailed learning much more physically-oriented biology and lab electronics, joining the 20th century after being (figuratively) educated in the 19th. This was a process of reacculturation so complete that my main research colleagues have been in medically- and engineering-related fields, and I belatedly came to understand the engineering research people who were around me in my childhood. But it cost time, money, and some of the personal input that my children should have had.
8. In my early teenage years, my parents helped start a small Unitarian fellowship in a tiny retired synagogue. I had no idea what they believed; my own religious ideas at that point mainly came from Julian Huxley. My Unitarian connection was weak when I went to college. Later, my devotion during free time was mainly to my family. It was not until the late 1980s that I really reconnected with UUism. That it did not attract my wife was not surprising, but I was grateful that the congregation was there when she left in late 1994, and the local UU congregation wherever I am has continued to be an important focus since then.
On some levels, my later years have made it possible for me to tie some things together better. I have lectured in Russia (in Russian) about my work on laryngeal physiology. My studies of Christian and Jewish sources give me a broader perspective on UUism, complementing the humanist perspective that I inherited from my father. Friends such as CC and Ms. Kitty have made me more aware of the importance of (different) aspects of progressive Christianity. At times I am still aware of the deeply destabilizing effects in myself of divorce after a long marriage, but I have survived so far, although I am entering the high-upkeep years of the human organism. An older physicist friend, once a student of Dirac and the younger Bragg, sent me a birthday card for last year, writing: "Life is precarious; be prepared for surprises." Indeed!
I understand from Ms. Kitty’s meme-assignment that I can save my soul if I write about eight defining moments in my life at which I might have lost my soul (on some points the jury is still out), or at least I learned something from the experience.
1. In the early and mid-20th century, American aeronautical engineering benefited from the immigration of German and other Central European applied scientists. When I was in the 3rd grade, the younger son of one of them was in the same class as I was. Richard (now a military historian) gave me academic competition such that I realized that whereas earlier I had done well enough, now I had to do better than I had known I could, which was a good habit to establish early.
2. In the same period, I was introduced to the elements of music theory and piano. I quit when I realized that I would never be a good pianist. I repeated this sequence with the recorder, the classical guitar, and singing. I learned a lot about music theory, and my father made sure that I learned about musical acoustics. But eventually I realized something: never let yourself or other people nudge you to do something because you or they think you should do it. Do what is fun and you are really good at, especially if other people are not good at it.
3. In my second year of college, I took an introductory course on linguistics from a great scholar on the history of languages. But, by that time, the historical approach he practiced no longer set the model of research in his field; it had been partly replaced by models drawn from mathematics. He himself had once had to choose whether he would accept a university scholarship in math or in linguistic studies, and had chosen the latter, which he now regretted. So, in late middle age, he tried to renew his mathematical studies, which of course led him nowhere; when he retired three years later in ill health and depression, he did not live long. One has only one life, and it needs some basic continuity and consistency.
4.. Early in college, I asked our family physician to refer me to one of his East European relatives to help me to improve my spoken Russian. He introduced me to his pharmacist aunt Shalumith Schneider, the daughter of a scholarly Vilna rabbi. She gave me years of friendship and tutorial in Russian language and literature. Since her native city was a great center of Jewish scholarship (the Vilna Gaon, the Vilna edition of the Talmud), she also gave me an implicit orientation in terms of her recognition of and devotion to the value of learning.
5. When I married at age 22, it was to someone who initially seemed well matched, an agnostic (read: no interest in religion) daughter of an American diplomatic family. Thirty-one years later, she moved back across the country from LA to her native Maine, and a year after that she filed for divorce. She had borne our children, typed my doctoral dissertation, and developed a private practice in counseling in an LA suburb. But the marriage had progressively turned emotionally sterile, starting halfway through. At times I say that I have never seen a bad divorce, on the principle that once either one of the parties has left in some sense, then the sooner the legal action is finished, the sooner both parties can get on with life. But divorce may bring terrible practical situations, including the freedom to commit appalling stupidities.
6. When I wrote my doctoral dissertation, I focussed on the grammar of an ancient language that was fundamental in East European studies. Since almost all of its early manuscripts were texts translated from Greek Christian sources, to write my dissertation I had to read thousands of pages of late Greek texts. This was effectively a total immersion course in Eastern Christianity. Although this material has never been central to how I earn my living, I have never entirely left it, and it has been a perennial background factor in how I think about the world and religion. Immersion leads to absorption.
7. When the Cold War and East European studies cooled, I shifted my orientation to the basic study of speech on a physiological level. This entailed learning much more physically-oriented biology and lab electronics, joining the 20th century after being (figuratively) educated in the 19th. This was a process of reacculturation so complete that my main research colleagues have been in medically- and engineering-related fields, and I belatedly came to understand the engineering research people who were around me in my childhood. But it cost time, money, and some of the personal input that my children should have had.
8. In my early teenage years, my parents helped start a small Unitarian fellowship in a tiny retired synagogue. I had no idea what they believed; my own religious ideas at that point mainly came from Julian Huxley. My Unitarian connection was weak when I went to college. Later, my devotion during free time was mainly to my family. It was not until the late 1980s that I really reconnected with UUism. That it did not attract my wife was not surprising, but I was grateful that the congregation was there when she left in late 1994, and the local UU congregation wherever I am has continued to be an important focus since then.
On some levels, my later years have made it possible for me to tie some things together better. I have lectured in Russia (in Russian) about my work on laryngeal physiology. My studies of Christian and Jewish sources give me a broader perspective on UUism, complementing the humanist perspective that I inherited from my father. Friends such as CC and Ms. Kitty have made me more aware of the importance of (different) aspects of progressive Christianity. At times I am still aware of the deeply destabilizing effects in myself of divorce after a long marriage, but I have survived so far, although I am entering the high-upkeep years of the human organism. An older physicist friend, once a student of Dirac and the younger Bragg, sent me a birthday card for last year, writing: "Life is precarious; be prepared for surprises." Indeed!
Sunday, July 22, 2007
Last few chapters of Potter
Sorry about the delay and sorry about the fact that no division between the chapters exists in the following. I finished the book early this morning and lent it to a friend.
There are some really good aspects to the end of the book. Lizard Eater is correct that the "Prince's Tale" chapter is first rate and does resolve many of the previous mysteries. The themes of discrimination (full-blood wizard vs. Human born, wizard vs. other) are nicely played out and what happens to Kingsley Shackeford is a nice touch in this regard.
The stuff you would expect is in the last few chapters. (I completely don't get why this review is getting blasted for spoiling anything. As I'm reading it, pretty much everything I saw was obviously going to happen.)
Possibly the thing I'd been looking forward to the most in this book was the Epilogue and I found that a disappointment. It focuses on relationships rather than any other aspects of life.
There's lots of death. Someone had told me in advance that two major characters die and I found myself wondering with each death who qualified as major. I'm still not sure who that's referring to as there are several good candidates. If I still care, I may start a discussion in a week or two.
Only two of the deaths seem superfluous, and even they are understandable, they just don't seem necessary as the point has well been made by then.
Molly Weasley gets a nice moment.
But yeah, overall it is extremely readable, does a serviceable job of giving you the answers you wanted, but leaves you wanting more. More explanations, more news on the minor characters, MUCH more Hogwarts.
Ah well, as Jana-who-creates pointed out, that just leaves more fodder for the fanfic writers.
CC
There are some really good aspects to the end of the book. Lizard Eater is correct that the "Prince's Tale" chapter is first rate and does resolve many of the previous mysteries. The themes of discrimination (full-blood wizard vs. Human born, wizard vs. other) are nicely played out and what happens to Kingsley Shackeford is a nice touch in this regard.
The stuff you would expect is in the last few chapters. (I completely don't get why this review is getting blasted for spoiling anything. As I'm reading it, pretty much everything I saw was obviously going to happen.)
Possibly the thing I'd been looking forward to the most in this book was the Epilogue and I found that a disappointment. It focuses on relationships rather than any other aspects of life.
There's lots of death. Someone had told me in advance that two major characters die and I found myself wondering with each death who qualified as major. I'm still not sure who that's referring to as there are several good candidates. If I still care, I may start a discussion in a week or two.
Only two of the deaths seem superfluous, and even they are understandable, they just don't seem necessary as the point has well been made by then.
Molly Weasley gets a nice moment.
But yeah, overall it is extremely readable, does a serviceable job of giving you the answers you wanted, but leaves you wanting more. More explanations, more news on the minor characters, MUCH more Hogwarts.
Ah well, as Jana-who-creates pointed out, that just leaves more fodder for the fanfic writers.
CC
Saturday, July 21, 2007
Liveblogging Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows
8:00am-Here goes. Again, no spoilers, but speculation on minor points. I knew I said I would start it at noon, but I changed my mind. I have dinner plans with a friend and would like to have the book done by dinnertime.
Chapter 1-8:12-In many respects, Rowling is gifted as a mystery writer and if she wanted to make her next project a mystery or thriller I think she'd be good at it. That said, she has a certain ham-handedness when she is witholding information that makes for a mildly irritating experience reading the book. Instead of simply not telling you something and giving the clues in a more subtle way, she repeatedly references the information she is witholding, almost as if she's dangling it in front of you. (You will probably have that experience reading this liveblogging since there's so much I won't want to say.) You can really see that in this chapter, though you get the piece of information by the end of the chapter.
It was very interesting to see the part of the wizarding world she shows in this chapter, though I did think it was a weaker opening than the last book's business with the two Prime ministers.
Chapter 2-8:36-So far, the things that have happened in this book are much what even the casual reader of the last book might have suspected. That said, I do really like what she does with Harry dealing with Dumbledore's death. Even people whom we are very close to are complicated, sometimes they have sides we couldn't see or understand in life, which is another confusing aspect of death.
Rowling also nicely reminds me why I don't like celebrity gossip much.
Chapter 3-8:51-This was the first chapter that really had me interested because it marked such a change in course for Harry's relationship to the characters in question. I really hope to see them again.
In a lot of ways, this book has the feel of the second half of Half-Blood Prince, which is perhaps why the beginning doesn't feel as strong as Half-Blood Prince's. In many ways, Half-Blood Prince began like the last book in the series should have.
Chapter 4-9:08 Interesting that the Order of the Phoenix would use tactics very familiar to Washingtonians. I find myself skipping pages of action sequences in all but the best books, and I didn't skip pages here. Rowling does a lovely job. She really does have a gift for action sequences. I'm finding myself wondering how the Order of the Phoenix got its name and what, if anything, the name has to do with Dumbledore's subversively-named pet phoenix Fawkes. The drawbacks of having Hagrid do the job he does here were obvious to me, I'm sure there's a benefit to it that I don't understand just yet.
Chapter 5-9:31- I really don't understand the mechanics of magic in the wizarding world sometimes. They can do all these amazing things, but apparently they can't create a few obvious things that one would think would be fairly simple. Part of the Hagrid question from last chapter was answered, BTW, and though I didn't find the answer satisfying, I doubt I'm going to get a better one. Also, Harry's rebellious teenager shtick is really getting old.
Chapter 6-9:51- The wedding planning is about how you would expect (charmant!) but it is fun and a nice change in tone. The tension between Harry and Ginny is nicely done. I know that the Horcrux hunt is necessary,but I still wish they were going back to Hogwarts. I'm really missing it.
Oh, and there's a beautiful bit of dialogue where Harry tells Ron and Hermione that they don't have to come on the Horcrux hunt and Hermione says gently that they're coming with him. That was decided months ago, years really. I'm not saying that the general theme If a good person and an evil person of equivilent power face off, good will triumph because good people have friends is unusual, but it is one that the series has used to great effect. Anyway, that bit of dialogue gave me the warm fuzzies. Yes, Hermione and Ron made the choice to stand by Harry no matter what years ago...
Chapter 7-10:14- I ask myself "Self, why is ministry of magic like that?" and the best response I can come up with is "Because it advances the plot"
In other news, Ron's continuing ineptness around women is great stuff.
Chapter 8-10:33- Lots of useful exposition happened here. Like the mean, gossipy old relative at the wedding, I am very interested to find out what exactly is in Rita Skeeter's book. I'm not sure of the significance of Luna's father's faux pas, but I am very interested to see...
Chapter 9-10:47- One would think that after six previous books, Harry would have learned something about lack of communication. Ah well...
Chapter 10-11:04-I really liked this chapter, which made me appreciate how tightly-written the previous books were and how well thought out a lot of this stuff was from the beginning. That the books have such a complex morality to them really makes them interesting. Also, I wonder how the seventh movie will handle this chapter as IMHO the fifth movie hasn't set what happened here up the way the fifth book did.
Chapter 11-11:23 I had wanted to see the character who is brought back at the end of this chapter again, but at least right now something about the way that character reappears feels a little contrived. I totally understand Harry's issue with the OotP member who comes to help him here.
Chapter 12-11:45 A college friend of mine had a theory about 2001:A Space Odyssy that the beautiful, but ultimately really dully, scenes in the first half were Kubrick's way of giving the audience the feeling of being on a long sapce voyage. Those scenes always have me twitching.
The last few chapters have had the same effect. I'm twitching, but so are the central characters.
Chapter 13-12:00 That was interesting. The institutions and the way that wizarding bearacracy is organized are one of the real gems of this series.
Chapter 14-For the last few chapters, I've felt I was waiting for something to happen. In this chapter, it finally has and the resulting action is quite welcome. Also, Mad-Eye Mooney's eye is not a horcrux. Ah well.
Chapter 15-Though the events of this chapter would have been quite rough on the characters, I'm actually glad for the events of this chapter to happen. They needed to for the book to retain emotional honesty.
Chapter 16- Finally the book is catching its stride. I found the first half of it quite slow, but the last few chapters have really reminded me what I love about this series.
Chapter 17-
Chapter 18-I assume this exposition is important, and if it is, fine. But it is slowing the story right when the story had finally started to move, so I sort of resent it anyway.
Chapter 19-2:08 Took them long enough to do what happened here. I'm not sure at this point if I want those two to get it on so we can have some comic relief or if I want some more action, but either way, the rising tension has gone past exciting and has begun to bug me. This is one ofthe disadvantages of the book not being set at Hogwarts. At a boarding school, there were opportunities for comic relief built in.
Chapter 20-2:22 One of my favorite things about this chapter is the anticipation of seeing one of my favorite characters again.
Chapter 21-2:42 Can't pretend I saw that one coming...
Chapter 22-2:59 I'd like all my friends to start a radio show named after me...
Chapter 23-3:18 That character's appearance was sort of random...
Chapter 24-3:52 Lots of exposition, but interesting exposition...
Chapter 25-4:03 I really liked this chapter. I am such a nerd.
Chapter 26-4:19-Wow. Can't wait for the movie of this...
Chapter 27-4:24 It is really exciting now. The book needed 100 pages cut or rewritten from the beginning,but at this point, it's really good stuff.
Chapter 1-8:12-In many respects, Rowling is gifted as a mystery writer and if she wanted to make her next project a mystery or thriller I think she'd be good at it. That said, she has a certain ham-handedness when she is witholding information that makes for a mildly irritating experience reading the book. Instead of simply not telling you something and giving the clues in a more subtle way, she repeatedly references the information she is witholding, almost as if she's dangling it in front of you. (You will probably have that experience reading this liveblogging since there's so much I won't want to say.) You can really see that in this chapter, though you get the piece of information by the end of the chapter.
It was very interesting to see the part of the wizarding world she shows in this chapter, though I did think it was a weaker opening than the last book's business with the two Prime ministers.
Chapter 2-8:36-So far, the things that have happened in this book are much what even the casual reader of the last book might have suspected. That said, I do really like what she does with Harry dealing with Dumbledore's death. Even people whom we are very close to are complicated, sometimes they have sides we couldn't see or understand in life, which is another confusing aspect of death.
Rowling also nicely reminds me why I don't like celebrity gossip much.
Chapter 3-8:51-This was the first chapter that really had me interested because it marked such a change in course for Harry's relationship to the characters in question. I really hope to see them again.
In a lot of ways, this book has the feel of the second half of Half-Blood Prince, which is perhaps why the beginning doesn't feel as strong as Half-Blood Prince's. In many ways, Half-Blood Prince began like the last book in the series should have.
Chapter 4-9:08 Interesting that the Order of the Phoenix would use tactics very familiar to Washingtonians. I find myself skipping pages of action sequences in all but the best books, and I didn't skip pages here. Rowling does a lovely job. She really does have a gift for action sequences. I'm finding myself wondering how the Order of the Phoenix got its name and what, if anything, the name has to do with Dumbledore's subversively-named pet phoenix Fawkes. The drawbacks of having Hagrid do the job he does here were obvious to me, I'm sure there's a benefit to it that I don't understand just yet.
Chapter 5-9:31- I really don't understand the mechanics of magic in the wizarding world sometimes. They can do all these amazing things, but apparently they can't create a few obvious things that one would think would be fairly simple. Part of the Hagrid question from last chapter was answered, BTW, and though I didn't find the answer satisfying, I doubt I'm going to get a better one. Also, Harry's rebellious teenager shtick is really getting old.
Chapter 6-9:51- The wedding planning is about how you would expect (charmant!) but it is fun and a nice change in tone. The tension between Harry and Ginny is nicely done. I know that the Horcrux hunt is necessary,but I still wish they were going back to Hogwarts. I'm really missing it.
Oh, and there's a beautiful bit of dialogue where Harry tells Ron and Hermione that they don't have to come on the Horcrux hunt and Hermione says gently that they're coming with him. That was decided months ago, years really. I'm not saying that the general theme If a good person and an evil person of equivilent power face off, good will triumph because good people have friends is unusual, but it is one that the series has used to great effect. Anyway, that bit of dialogue gave me the warm fuzzies. Yes, Hermione and Ron made the choice to stand by Harry no matter what years ago...
Chapter 7-10:14- I ask myself "Self, why is ministry of magic like that?" and the best response I can come up with is "Because it advances the plot"
In other news, Ron's continuing ineptness around women is great stuff.
Chapter 8-10:33- Lots of useful exposition happened here. Like the mean, gossipy old relative at the wedding, I am very interested to find out what exactly is in Rita Skeeter's book. I'm not sure of the significance of Luna's father's faux pas, but I am very interested to see...
Chapter 9-10:47- One would think that after six previous books, Harry would have learned something about lack of communication. Ah well...
Chapter 10-11:04-I really liked this chapter, which made me appreciate how tightly-written the previous books were and how well thought out a lot of this stuff was from the beginning. That the books have such a complex morality to them really makes them interesting. Also, I wonder how the seventh movie will handle this chapter as IMHO the fifth movie hasn't set what happened here up the way the fifth book did.
Chapter 11-11:23 I had wanted to see the character who is brought back at the end of this chapter again, but at least right now something about the way that character reappears feels a little contrived. I totally understand Harry's issue with the OotP member who comes to help him here.
Chapter 12-11:45 A college friend of mine had a theory about 2001:A Space Odyssy that the beautiful, but ultimately really dully, scenes in the first half were Kubrick's way of giving the audience the feeling of being on a long sapce voyage. Those scenes always have me twitching.
The last few chapters have had the same effect. I'm twitching, but so are the central characters.
Chapter 13-12:00 That was interesting. The institutions and the way that wizarding bearacracy is organized are one of the real gems of this series.
Chapter 14-For the last few chapters, I've felt I was waiting for something to happen. In this chapter, it finally has and the resulting action is quite welcome. Also, Mad-Eye Mooney's eye is not a horcrux. Ah well.
Chapter 15-Though the events of this chapter would have been quite rough on the characters, I'm actually glad for the events of this chapter to happen. They needed to for the book to retain emotional honesty.
Chapter 16- Finally the book is catching its stride. I found the first half of it quite slow, but the last few chapters have really reminded me what I love about this series.
Chapter 17-
- That
Chapter 18-I assume this exposition is important, and if it is, fine. But it is slowing the story right when the story had finally started to move, so I sort of resent it anyway.
Chapter 19-2:08 Took them long enough to do what happened here. I'm not sure at this point if I want those two to get it on so we can have some comic relief or if I want some more action, but either way, the rising tension has gone past exciting and has begun to bug me. This is one ofthe disadvantages of the book not being set at Hogwarts. At a boarding school, there were opportunities for comic relief built in.
Chapter 20-2:22 One of my favorite things about this chapter is the anticipation of seeing one of my favorite characters again.
Chapter 21-2:42 Can't pretend I saw that one coming...
Chapter 22-2:59 I'd like all my friends to start a radio show named after me...
Chapter 23-3:18 That character's appearance was sort of random...
Chapter 24-3:52 Lots of exposition, but interesting exposition...
Chapter 25-4:03 I really liked this chapter. I am such a nerd.
Chapter 26-4:19-Wow. Can't wait for the movie of this...
Chapter 27-4:24 It is really exciting now. The book needed 100 pages cut or rewritten from the beginning,but at this point, it's really good stuff.
Friday, July 20, 2007
The CSO sometimes says I have no sense of humor.
Well, I do, it's just a very complex sort.
your humor style:
CLEAN | COMPLEX | DARK
You like things edgy, subtle, and smart. I guess that means you're probably an intellectual, but don't take that to mean pretentious. You realize 'dumb' can be witty--after all isn't that the Simpsons' philosophy?--but rudeness for its own sake, 'gross-out' humor and most other things found in a fraternity leave you totally flat.
I guess you just have a more cerebral approach than most. You have the perfect mindset for a joke writer or staff writer.
Your sense of humor takes the most thought to appreciate, but it's also the best, in my opinion.
You probably loved the Office. If you don't know what I'm talking about, check it out here: http://www.bbc.co.uk/comedy/theoffice/.
PEOPLE LIKE YOU: Jon Stewart - Woody Allen - Ricky Gervais
The 3-Variable Funny Test!
- it rules -
If you're interested, try my best friend's best test: The Genghis Khan Genetic Fitness Masterpiece
Your Score: the Wit
(76% dark, 23% spontaneous, 10% vulgar)
CLEAN | COMPLEX | DARK
You like things edgy, subtle, and smart. I guess that means you're probably an intellectual, but don't take that to mean pretentious. You realize 'dumb' can be witty--after all isn't that the Simpsons' philosophy?--but rudeness for its own sake, 'gross-out' humor and most other things found in a fraternity leave you totally flat.
I guess you just have a more cerebral approach than most. You have the perfect mindset for a joke writer or staff writer.
Your sense of humor takes the most thought to appreciate, but it's also the best, in my opinion.
You probably loved the Office. If you don't know what I'm talking about, check it out here: http://www.bbc.co.uk/comedy/theoffice/.
PEOPLE LIKE YOU: Jon Stewart - Woody Allen - Ricky Gervais
The 3-Variable Funny Test!
- it rules -
If you're interested, try my best friend's best test: The Genghis Khan Genetic Fitness Masterpiece
| Link: The 3 Variable Funny Test written by jason_bateman on OkCupid Free Online Dating, home of the The Dating Persona Test |
Note
I will be live-blogging the last Harry Potter novel. I plan to do it about the same way I did novel six.
I'm going to a party the night before and my housemates are picking up my copy of the book. I will likely start reading/blogging it at noon Saturday and post a comment on every chapter until I get to the end. This will be spoiler-free but I will allow myself speculation on minor points. (Last year I realized from the first few chapters that Fleur wasn't as bad as people thought and that Ginny Weasely would probably make a good wife for Harry and wrote those things. At the time I took them as opinions of my own and I didn't realize I had just picked up on the foreshadowing.)
OK, before I read the last novel, I want to get two predictions/thoughts out on the series:
1. Neville isn't stupid in the least. Whatever Valdemort did to his parents rubbed off on him a bit and affected his memory and this has been a point since the very first book (when Neville's memory charm was stolen by Draco during the flying lessons.) Most of his academic problems have relatedto memory as well. I would think a point that has been there since book one would be an important point.
2. Readers will recall that the time Draco saw a dementor, it didn't mean much to him. A dementor takes the most horrifying thing you've ever seen and plays it back to you. So if you haven't seen anything particularly horrifying, it doesn't affect you much.
Harry's cousin Dudley in many ways reminds my of how my brother Jason was at that age. He's a spoiled suburban punk in baggy pants. Jason's had every blow softened for him and I don't know what his worst memory would be, but I doubt it would be anything particularly traumatic.
But when Dudley saw a dementor in book five, it damn near put him in the psych ward.
I'd like to know what Dudley has seen.
CC
I'm going to a party the night before and my housemates are picking up my copy of the book. I will likely start reading/blogging it at noon Saturday and post a comment on every chapter until I get to the end. This will be spoiler-free but I will allow myself speculation on minor points. (Last year I realized from the first few chapters that Fleur wasn't as bad as people thought and that Ginny Weasely would probably make a good wife for Harry and wrote those things. At the time I took them as opinions of my own and I didn't realize I had just picked up on the foreshadowing.)
OK, before I read the last novel, I want to get two predictions/thoughts out on the series:
1. Neville isn't stupid in the least. Whatever Valdemort did to his parents rubbed off on him a bit and affected his memory and this has been a point since the very first book (when Neville's memory charm was stolen by Draco during the flying lessons.) Most of his academic problems have relatedto memory as well. I would think a point that has been there since book one would be an important point.
2. Readers will recall that the time Draco saw a dementor, it didn't mean much to him. A dementor takes the most horrifying thing you've ever seen and plays it back to you. So if you haven't seen anything particularly horrifying, it doesn't affect you much.
Harry's cousin Dudley in many ways reminds my of how my brother Jason was at that age. He's a spoiled suburban punk in baggy pants. Jason's had every blow softened for him and I don't know what his worst memory would be, but I doubt it would be anything particularly traumatic.
But when Dudley saw a dementor in book five, it damn near put him in the psych ward.
I'd like to know what Dudley has seen.
CC
CC the party girl
Both LinguistFriend and Ms. Kitty have asked for an account of my birthday party last weekend. Probably the most interesting feature of the party was the guests. TheCSO, a big fan of Anime conventions, invited his engineer-type friends and their wives. CC, who likes long discussions of deep topics late at night, had invited a bunch of her creative-type friends.
I kid you not, the engineers were all there by 7:15 and left at ten. The creative types began to trickle in at 8:30 and the last ones left after one.
I was going for a retro theme so I made retro snacks. I did little chicken salad sandwiches, party meatballs, keishes, rumaki and I got the ChaliceMom to do me some deviled eggs. We drank mojitos, cosmos and gimlets and Sarah-the-extrovert brought port. Oh and by the end of the night I was drinking apple pucker, a drink I learned about from drag queens in New Orleans.
Jana-who-creates was there and brought her family. Zombie Kid and TheGnome were their usual exuberant and delightful selves. I persuaded ZombieKid to do his Zombie impression to the great amusement of the partygoers. If his mother allows it, one of these days I'm going to take a picture and post it. This Zombie impression is just that impressive. TheGnome had insisted his family give me a whoopie cushion for my birthday, so that was one of my presents from them. The usefulness of a whoopie cushion at Georgetown Law was discussed.
At sround midnight, the creative types decided we need a quote board where amusing things people say can be recorded for posterity. A few months ago, I had bought a large whiteboard where I could list tasks my housemates needed to do. To say it didn't help would be an understatement. But anyway, we had the whiteboard downstairs and theCSO brought it up and we started recording people's hilarious witticisms for posterity.
The next morning, nothing recorded on the quote board was particularly funny or interesting.
So, I guess it was a good party.
CC
I kid you not, the engineers were all there by 7:15 and left at ten. The creative types began to trickle in at 8:30 and the last ones left after one.
I was going for a retro theme so I made retro snacks. I did little chicken salad sandwiches, party meatballs, keishes, rumaki and I got the ChaliceMom to do me some deviled eggs. We drank mojitos, cosmos and gimlets and Sarah-the-extrovert brought port. Oh and by the end of the night I was drinking apple pucker, a drink I learned about from drag queens in New Orleans.
Jana-who-creates was there and brought her family. Zombie Kid and TheGnome were their usual exuberant and delightful selves. I persuaded ZombieKid to do his Zombie impression to the great amusement of the partygoers. If his mother allows it, one of these days I'm going to take a picture and post it. This Zombie impression is just that impressive. TheGnome had insisted his family give me a whoopie cushion for my birthday, so that was one of my presents from them. The usefulness of a whoopie cushion at Georgetown Law was discussed.
At sround midnight, the creative types decided we need a quote board where amusing things people say can be recorded for posterity. A few months ago, I had bought a large whiteboard where I could list tasks my housemates needed to do. To say it didn't help would be an understatement. But anyway, we had the whiteboard downstairs and theCSO brought it up and we started recording people's hilarious witticisms for posterity.
The next morning, nothing recorded on the quote board was particularly funny or interesting.
So, I guess it was a good party.
CC
Thursday, July 19, 2007
People who are nice to CC than she deserves.
I e-mailed Margaret Maron to nitpick a point in one of her novels and she wrote me a really polite and wonderful response that answered my question.
Squee!!
CC
Squee!!
CC
Tuesday, July 17, 2007
An Organization by any other name...
I had a thought about the Independent Affiliates situation recently.
Recall how when the AUC first split off, it had taken the name “American Unitarian Association” and the UUA immediately sued to get it back.
I thought that was a brilliant trap on the UUA’s part to hamstring the AUC and the AUC played right into it. The got national press coverage for splitting off, we’re talking an article in the Wall Street Journal among others.
And what did the AUC leadership waste that national attention doing?
Complaining about the lawsuit over the name, bitching about the UUA and generally making themselves look like UUism’s bitter ex-husband.
They didn’t preach a positive message or in other ways sound like a movement that was going anyplace, they just sounded like a bunch of petty malcontents and the AUC membership has been pretty tiny ever since. (Though they’ve been way playing down the malcontent message in the last few years and I am sure it has improved.)
Now the Independent Affiliate situation has me considering the name question again.
If CUUPs, for example, is no longer affiliated with UUism, will they have to change their name? What effect will THAT have on the organizations in question?
CC
Recall how when the AUC first split off, it had taken the name “American Unitarian Association” and the UUA immediately sued to get it back.
I thought that was a brilliant trap on the UUA’s part to hamstring the AUC and the AUC played right into it. The got national press coverage for splitting off, we’re talking an article in the Wall Street Journal among others.
And what did the AUC leadership waste that national attention doing?
Complaining about the lawsuit over the name, bitching about the UUA and generally making themselves look like UUism’s bitter ex-husband.
They didn’t preach a positive message or in other ways sound like a movement that was going anyplace, they just sounded like a bunch of petty malcontents and the AUC membership has been pretty tiny ever since. (Though they’ve been way playing down the malcontent message in the last few years and I am sure it has improved.)
Now the Independent Affiliate situation has me considering the name question again.
If CUUPs, for example, is no longer affiliated with UUism, will they have to change their name? What effect will THAT have on the organizations in question?
CC
Monday, July 16, 2007
Is this who we want to be? Seriously?
The UUA Washington Office's blog has really pissed me off.
A few weeks ago, another UU Blogger sent me an email pointing out that nobody had ever even posted a comment to the UUA Washington Office's blog "Inspired Faith, effective action." At the time, I intended to put up a post making fun of them, but I got busy and forgot.
Today I thought of it and went back only to find their latest entry, which begins:
Just when you think the "religious right" can't get any more intolerant and ridiculous...then they do.
Umm... They don't like us either, I'm fairly confident, but are statements like this the UUAWO's idea of a path to a better world?
And the NEXT post begins:
So, in its infinite wisdom, the Administration has managed to...
Sigh. I bet the Republican UUs are really feeling the love now. (If we're going to be snarky, can we at least be FUNNY snarky as opposed to just RUDE snarky?)
Now y'all know that snark is not a weapon I'm afraid to use. But I am a layperson. I don't think it is appropriate for our denomination's representatives speaking in an apparently official capacity to be talking that way, even if they are talking about people who don't think the way most of us do.
I read that page and left it with the impression that the current staff of the UUA Washington Office all think conservatives are idiots and that it would be hopeless to ever try to see their side or work with them.
If that's the case, can we get rid of the current UUAWO staff and get in some people who are willing to listen a little more and keep more of an open mind? Because IMHO this sort of yellow-dog partisanship is not a healthy thing for a religion.
CC
who, for the record goes back and forth on Hate Crime legislation because of the increasing-your-sentence-because-of-what-you-were-thinking implications, believes that Hindus should be allowed to give the opening prayer in the Senate and would rather the administration had chosen a more moderate surgeon general nomination. But she can express those opinions without being an asshole about it and without implying that anyone who disagrees with her is stupid.
A few weeks ago, another UU Blogger sent me an email pointing out that nobody had ever even posted a comment to the UUA Washington Office's blog "Inspired Faith, effective action." At the time, I intended to put up a post making fun of them, but I got busy and forgot.
Today I thought of it and went back only to find their latest entry, which begins:
Just when you think the "religious right" can't get any more intolerant and ridiculous...then they do.
Umm... They don't like us either, I'm fairly confident, but are statements like this the UUAWO's idea of a path to a better world?
And the NEXT post begins:
So, in its infinite wisdom, the Administration has managed to...
Sigh. I bet the Republican UUs are really feeling the love now. (If we're going to be snarky, can we at least be FUNNY snarky as opposed to just RUDE snarky?)
Now y'all know that snark is not a weapon I'm afraid to use. But I am a layperson. I don't think it is appropriate for our denomination's representatives speaking in an apparently official capacity to be talking that way, even if they are talking about people who don't think the way most of us do.
I read that page and left it with the impression that the current staff of the UUA Washington Office all think conservatives are idiots and that it would be hopeless to ever try to see their side or work with them.
If that's the case, can we get rid of the current UUAWO staff and get in some people who are willing to listen a little more and keep more of an open mind? Because IMHO this sort of yellow-dog partisanship is not a healthy thing for a religion.
CC
who, for the record goes back and forth on Hate Crime legislation because of the increasing-your-sentence-because-of-what-you-were-thinking implications, believes that Hindus should be allowed to give the opening prayer in the Senate and would rather the administration had chosen a more moderate surgeon general nomination. But she can express those opinions without being an asshole about it and without implying that anyone who disagrees with her is stupid.
Saturday, July 14, 2007
From the party store
If you ever throw a retro 1950's themed party, do it in the summertime.
Almost all "luau" themed decorations look straight out of a bad 50's movie...
CC
not sure if she needs the plastic faux-coconut cups, but sorely tempted.
--
___________________________
http://chalicechick.com/
"Friends? Hah. These are my only friends. Grown-up nerds like Gore
Vidal. And HE's kissed more boys than I ever will."
--Lisa Simpson
Thursday, July 12, 2007
In honor of the Harry Potter movie...
Let's watch that Alan Rickman video again, oh, seven or eight times...
CC
The Mediocre Goth Writer Speaks the Truth
"Remember, if you post it in a public blog, the entire world is allowed to get up in your grill about it" - Poppy Z. Brite
Wednesday, July 11, 2007
I guess I just wasn't his type...
I once had a job interview with an affable man who didn't end up hiring me. He'd given me a Myers-Briggs and I had come up my usual type.
"Hmmm..." He said, "An INTP. My ex-wife was an INTP."
"Mmm..." I said, not knowing what else to say.
He leaned across the desk, staring intensely into my eyes. "Do most people in the world not exist for you?"
"No," I said. "Well, I mean, here are some people I really connect with and some I don't, but even the people I don't connect with still exist."
"They just FEEL like they don't exist."
As I said, I didn't get the job, which wasn't a huge surprise. But I've never forgotten that guy or that conversation.
And I try to be better about letting even the people I don't naturally feel a connection to know they exist.
CC
interested to hear the myers-briggs type of any Chalicesseur willing to share.
"Hmmm..." He said, "An INTP. My ex-wife was an INTP."
"Mmm..." I said, not knowing what else to say.
He leaned across the desk, staring intensely into my eyes. "Do most people in the world not exist for you?"
"No," I said. "Well, I mean, here are some people I really connect with and some I don't, but even the people I don't connect with still exist."
"They just FEEL like they don't exist."
As I said, I didn't get the job, which wasn't a huge surprise. But I've never forgotten that guy or that conversation.
And I try to be better about letting even the people I don't naturally feel a connection to know they exist.
CC
interested to hear the myers-briggs type of any Chalicesseur willing to share.
Tuesday, July 10, 2007
OK, I *must* own The Secret now...
Katy-the-Wise tipped me off that the Secret contains a bunch of Emerson quotes and they are all fake.
I'd like to see if this is true.
Would a Chalicesseur be kind enough to buy it for me?
CC
I'd like to see if this is true.
Would a Chalicesseur be kind enough to buy it for me?
CC
Monday, July 09, 2007
Sunday, July 08, 2007
Like, Peacebang, but you know, seriously not
So I was looking for clubwear to wear to a party next weekend and I turned up this page.
I think PB and this woman should get together and do "Beauty Tips for Sexy Ministers."
Link not work-safe. Like, at all.
CC
EDITED because I had missed that the writer was a woman
I think PB and this woman should get together and do "Beauty Tips for Sexy Ministers."
Link not work-safe. Like, at all.
CC
EDITED because I had missed that the writer was a woman
Saturday, July 07, 2007
CC does an experiment II
Last year, I turned comment moderation on for a day so that I could ask the Chalicesseurs a question and people could answer without reading other people's answers first.
I'm going to do it again today.
Today's question: What does "Alleluia" mean?
When you say it in church, what do you feel like you are saying?
I specifically mean literal meanings, but what it means to you is good, too.
Feel free to comment "I don't know" if you don't know, in fact, please do.
Thanks!
I'm going to do it again today.
Today's question: What does "Alleluia" mean?
When you say it in church, what do you feel like you are saying?
I specifically mean literal meanings, but what it means to you is good, too.
Feel free to comment "I don't know" if you don't know, in fact, please do.
Thanks!
A place to write
Linguist Friend and I have a habit of beneficently nagging one another, saving our respective significant others the trouble of bothering us about things we really should take care of.
I've been bothering him about going to the doctor and writing scholarly papers recently. His topic has been a little more benign.
I need a desk.
Law school* is less than two months away at this point and the desk in my home office is still an old crappy one of my brother's that I hate and never use as more than a surface to stack papers. (I'm typing this blog post into a laptop as I sit crosslegged on the bed.)
LF has been bringing my lack of desk up for at least his last two visits. And I've been looking at craigslist and the occiasional office supply store.
In the last week, I have gotten serious about it and have been looking far more agressively.
I have probably looked at several dozen desks in person and a hundred online. No used desk has been what I'm looking for. The old ones (from before the age of computers) are too small and the used new ones are too fugly.
And I hate pressboard.
I'm realizing the desk I really want is Blue van Meer's desk from Marisha Pessl's brilliant novel Special Topics in Calamity Physics:
...But as I pushed open the bedroom door at the top of the stairs and walked into the large blue walled room covered in pastoral oil paitings, giant windows along the far wall blistered with bubble curtains, I discovered not a rare, underground edition of Wie schafft man ein Masterwerk or The Step-by-Step Manual For Crafting Your Magnum Opus, but, astonishingly, my old Citizen Kane desk pushed into the corner by the window. It was the real thing, elephantine, walnut, Renaissance revival library table I'd had eight years ago at 142 Tellwood Street in Wayne,Oklahoma.
Daddy had found the desk at the Lord and Lady Hillier Estate Sale just outside of Tulsa, to which antiques wheeler-and-dealer June Bug, Pattie 'Let's Make a Deal' Lupine, had dragged Dad one stuffy Sunday afternoon. For some reason, when Dad saw the desk (and the five struggling Armies it took to get it on the auction platform,) he saw me and only me presiding over it (Though I was only eight with a wingspan less than half its length). He paid a huge, undisclosed amount for it and announced with great flourish that this was 'Blue's desk,' a desk 'worthy of my little Eve of St. Agnes, upon which she will unmask all the great ideas...'
...And then, rather anticlimactically, I was only able to unmask great idea in Wayne, because we weren't able to take the desk with us to Sluder, Florida-something to do with the mover (the falsely advertised 'You CAN Take It With You Moving Co.') being unable to fit it in the van. I shed ferocious tears and called Dad a reptile when we had to leave it, as if it wasn't just an oversized table with elaborate talon legs and seven drawers requiring seven individual keys, but a black pony I was abandoning in the barn..."
Yep, that's the desk I want.
But it's extremely expensive. And fictional.
So far, I haven't had much luck. Neither of the estate sales I went to this morning were those of an elderly doctor, lawyer or perhaps detective who shuffled off this mortal coil just in time for me to buy his handsome if scratched olddesk from an irresponsible nephew selling it cheaply to make a fast dime.
I went to Crate and Barrell and immersed myself in middle class respectability, and I loved this one, but don't have two thousand dollars for it. I went World Market for knock-off middle class respectability and thought this one was ok without the hutch. But it still didn't rock my world.
So far the desk I hate least is this one, which provides a surprising amount of charm for something from Staples and folds out into a bigger table that could take up half of the library during finals week.
Ooh... But then there's this one...
A little expensive, but spiffy...
Sigh.
CC
*Yeah, I'm pretty obsessed with law school at this point and write about it frequently. You should have seen me two months before the wedding.
I've been bothering him about going to the doctor and writing scholarly papers recently. His topic has been a little more benign.
I need a desk.
Law school* is less than two months away at this point and the desk in my home office is still an old crappy one of my brother's that I hate and never use as more than a surface to stack papers. (I'm typing this blog post into a laptop as I sit crosslegged on the bed.)
LF has been bringing my lack of desk up for at least his last two visits. And I've been looking at craigslist and the occiasional office supply store.
In the last week, I have gotten serious about it and have been looking far more agressively.
I have probably looked at several dozen desks in person and a hundred online. No used desk has been what I'm looking for. The old ones (from before the age of computers) are too small and the used new ones are too fugly.
And I hate pressboard.
I'm realizing the desk I really want is Blue van Meer's desk from Marisha Pessl's brilliant novel Special Topics in Calamity Physics:
...But as I pushed open the bedroom door at the top of the stairs and walked into the large blue walled room covered in pastoral oil paitings, giant windows along the far wall blistered with bubble curtains, I discovered not a rare, underground edition of Wie schafft man ein Masterwerk or The Step-by-Step Manual For Crafting Your Magnum Opus, but, astonishingly, my old Citizen Kane desk pushed into the corner by the window. It was the real thing, elephantine, walnut, Renaissance revival library table I'd had eight years ago at 142 Tellwood Street in Wayne,Oklahoma.
Daddy had found the desk at the Lord and Lady Hillier Estate Sale just outside of Tulsa, to which antiques wheeler-and-dealer June Bug, Pattie 'Let's Make a Deal' Lupine, had dragged Dad one stuffy Sunday afternoon. For some reason, when Dad saw the desk (and the five struggling Armies it took to get it on the auction platform,) he saw me and only me presiding over it (Though I was only eight with a wingspan less than half its length). He paid a huge, undisclosed amount for it and announced with great flourish that this was 'Blue's desk,' a desk 'worthy of my little Eve of St. Agnes, upon which she will unmask all the great ideas...'
...And then, rather anticlimactically, I was only able to unmask great idea in Wayne, because we weren't able to take the desk with us to Sluder, Florida-something to do with the mover (the falsely advertised 'You CAN Take It With You Moving Co.') being unable to fit it in the van. I shed ferocious tears and called Dad a reptile when we had to leave it, as if it wasn't just an oversized table with elaborate talon legs and seven drawers requiring seven individual keys, but a black pony I was abandoning in the barn..."
Yep, that's the desk I want.
But it's extremely expensive. And fictional.
So far, I haven't had much luck. Neither of the estate sales I went to this morning were those of an elderly doctor, lawyer or perhaps detective who shuffled off this mortal coil just in time for me to buy his handsome if scratched olddesk from an irresponsible nephew selling it cheaply to make a fast dime.
I went to Crate and Barrell and immersed myself in middle class respectability, and I loved this one, but don't have two thousand dollars for it. I went World Market for knock-off middle class respectability and thought this one was ok without the hutch. But it still didn't rock my world.
So far the desk I hate least is this one, which provides a surprising amount of charm for something from Staples and folds out into a bigger table that could take up half of the library during finals week.
Ooh... But then there's this one...
A little expensive, but spiffy...
Sigh.
CC
*Yeah, I'm pretty obsessed with law school at this point and write about it frequently. You should have seen me two months before the wedding.
Crystalizing my thinking on the Polyamory in UUism discussion
If you're just joining the Chaliceblog, I'm in the middle of a discussion of a controversy involving polyamorists wanting official recognition in the Unitarian church.
Having read LT's latest bit on the Polyamory discussion, I'm realizing that it's not that I worry what polyamorists will do to UUism.
I worry what UUism will do to the Polyamorists. I mean,the polyamorists I know (who would best be described religiously as "non-denominational pagans") get that what they are doing is unusual and don't seem to blame their families for not understanding. They are appreciative of my efforts to reach out and understand, they reach back, and don't call me names when my efforts are imperfect.
They see polyamory as something they do because it is fun, not that it is their societal cross to bear. They have a sense of humor about it, even a sense of humor that someone outside the group can laugh along with without being viewed as bigot.
The husband of the polyamorous couple I knew best was recently extolling the virtues of being able to sleep with whomever he wanted. I gently made the point that I didn't think an open marriage was for me.
He shrugged. "Well, you're missing out on a lot of fun," he said.
"I'm sure I am."
And that was that.
So what would happen to these reasonable, open, happy people if they were immersed in UUism's "bigger victim than thou" culture?
I'd rather not imagine, though LT is right that you can see some early examples in his comments threads.
CC
Having read LT's latest bit on the Polyamory discussion, I'm realizing that it's not that I worry what polyamorists will do to UUism.
I worry what UUism will do to the Polyamorists. I mean,the polyamorists I know (who would best be described religiously as "non-denominational pagans") get that what they are doing is unusual and don't seem to blame their families for not understanding. They are appreciative of my efforts to reach out and understand, they reach back, and don't call me names when my efforts are imperfect.
They see polyamory as something they do because it is fun, not that it is their societal cross to bear. They have a sense of humor about it, even a sense of humor that someone outside the group can laugh along with without being viewed as bigot.
The husband of the polyamorous couple I knew best was recently extolling the virtues of being able to sleep with whomever he wanted. I gently made the point that I didn't think an open marriage was for me.
He shrugged. "Well, you're missing out on a lot of fun," he said.
"I'm sure I am."
And that was that.
So what would happen to these reasonable, open, happy people if they were immersed in UUism's "bigger victim than thou" culture?
I'd rather not imagine, though LT is right that you can see some early examples in his comments threads.
CC
Polyamory and the "ick" factor
There is a truly fabulous discussion of polyamory going on at The Lively Tradition.
A few thoughts.
I talked about my feelings on polamory here
Essentially, I don't particularly have a problem with it when it is practised unselfishly. I'm not entirely certain a family with kids CAN practice it unselfishly, though I suppose that if people who had been in a stable relationship for some time had children and were committed to remaining stable, that could work. Polyamory does not strike me as sufficient grounds for removal by child protective services, at the same time, I don't know that most people are up to the challenges of balancing their needs with their lovers' needs with their children's needs.
My understanding of the sociology of polygyny (one man with lots of women, polyandry, the reverse, is unusual almost to the point of being unheard of) is that it has traditionally been practiced in societies with great weath disparities under the theory that women consider themselves better off the tenth wife of the king than the only wife of a peasant.
(Note also how the extramarital affair is really common among powerful men and how woman often chase powerful men and do their best to seduce them into that sort of interaction.)
Anyway, I really hope polyamory isn't the root of the IA mess.
It's not my favorite choice and I think it is best practiced as a private thing, but I would certainly not object to polyamorous folks being active members of my church.
At the same time, I am really wary of getting dragged in to another political struggle that I only semi agree with.
CC
A few thoughts.
I talked about my feelings on polamory here
Essentially, I don't particularly have a problem with it when it is practised unselfishly. I'm not entirely certain a family with kids CAN practice it unselfishly, though I suppose that if people who had been in a stable relationship for some time had children and were committed to remaining stable, that could work. Polyamory does not strike me as sufficient grounds for removal by child protective services, at the same time, I don't know that most people are up to the challenges of balancing their needs with their lovers' needs with their children's needs.
My understanding of the sociology of polygyny (one man with lots of women, polyandry, the reverse, is unusual almost to the point of being unheard of) is that it has traditionally been practiced in societies with great weath disparities under the theory that women consider themselves better off the tenth wife of the king than the only wife of a peasant.
(Note also how the extramarital affair is really common among powerful men and how woman often chase powerful men and do their best to seduce them into that sort of interaction.)
Anyway, I really hope polyamory isn't the root of the IA mess.
It's not my favorite choice and I think it is best practiced as a private thing, but I would certainly not object to polyamorous folks being active members of my church.
At the same time, I am really wary of getting dragged in to another political struggle that I only semi agree with.
CC
Friday, July 06, 2007
Welcome St. Andrews readers
I do write about things other than sex, Unitarian Universalism and the comedy of manners that is my personal life.
Just not recently.
CC
Just not recently.
CC
Thursday, July 05, 2007
One ball in particular.
Emily Dickenson has a poem that ends "and sequence raveled out of sound, like balls upon a floor."
It's one of those phrases that haunts me. It has been haunting me especially recently as several aspects of life that seemed to stand in order have scattered and rolled around as if struck by unseen forces.
Like balls upon a floor, in fact.
The easiest to talk about is that the CSO's and my undergraduate institution has just lost accreditation. Now they are appealling the decision and it sounds like the litigation will go on so long that theoretically I could help by the time it is finishing up. And it keeps the accreditation as long as it is fighting it.
My acceptance to law school will be fine, says the expert on such things whom I called to discuss the issue. (It took a village to get me into law school, and staying is totally up to me, but those insecurities are a whole 'nother post.)
So, putting aside the worry about me, I am really bummed that St. Andrews is facing these problems. The accreditation concerns are all about the finances of the school, which have always been shitty, rather than the academics, which are spotty but not unusually so.
Worried little groups of alums and faculty have gathered, bitching and talking and trying to deal.
My initial reaction to this was an uncharictaristic burst of school spirit. In a letter to my smart friend Pam, I wrote:
Making the value of the degree suck because of pulling the
accreditation so that it won't suck if the school were to close
reminded me very much of a case I read about recently where a judge
sentenced two teenagers to jail and the sex offender list because they
took pictures of themselves having sex and sent them to each other.
His justification? If such pictures of them, that were technically
kiddie porn, got out it could ruin their lives.
Destroying something so it doesn't destroy itself makes no sense to
me. I realize this is an oversimplification, but it doesn't seem like
much of one.
Having read more about the issue, I am seeing it as more complicated than that, but my loyalty is basically with the place I went to school, and my husband went to school, and my mom went to school, and my dad went to school.
And my belief that there are many worse small colleges out there.
Things feel scattered right now, and having one more place that felt a bit like home being threated is not a welcome addition to my emotional landscape.
CC
It's one of those phrases that haunts me. It has been haunting me especially recently as several aspects of life that seemed to stand in order have scattered and rolled around as if struck by unseen forces.
Like balls upon a floor, in fact.
The easiest to talk about is that the CSO's and my undergraduate institution has just lost accreditation. Now they are appealling the decision and it sounds like the litigation will go on so long that theoretically I could help by the time it is finishing up. And it keeps the accreditation as long as it is fighting it.
My acceptance to law school will be fine, says the expert on such things whom I called to discuss the issue. (It took a village to get me into law school, and staying is totally up to me, but those insecurities are a whole 'nother post.)
So, putting aside the worry about me, I am really bummed that St. Andrews is facing these problems. The accreditation concerns are all about the finances of the school, which have always been shitty, rather than the academics, which are spotty but not unusually so.
Worried little groups of alums and faculty have gathered, bitching and talking and trying to deal.
My initial reaction to this was an uncharictaristic burst of school spirit. In a letter to my smart friend Pam, I wrote:
Making the value of the degree suck because of pulling the
accreditation so that it won't suck if the school were to close
reminded me very much of a case I read about recently where a judge
sentenced two teenagers to jail and the sex offender list because they
took pictures of themselves having sex and sent them to each other.
His justification? If such pictures of them, that were technically
kiddie porn, got out it could ruin their lives.
Destroying something so it doesn't destroy itself makes no sense to
me. I realize this is an oversimplification, but it doesn't seem like
much of one.
Having read more about the issue, I am seeing it as more complicated than that, but my loyalty is basically with the place I went to school, and my husband went to school, and my mom went to school, and my dad went to school.
And my belief that there are many worse small colleges out there.
Things feel scattered right now, and having one more place that felt a bit like home being threated is not a welcome addition to my emotional landscape.
CC
Wednesday, July 04, 2007
All people should be like this
Our internet is out, so I am sitting in Panera getting in my internet time.
A little girl and her dad just sat down next to me. The dad opened a laptop so the little girl could play a game. I sighed internally as the beeps and whistles of the game began.
A moment later, the girl said, plain as day.
"Daddy, could you show me how to turn the sound down on this game? I don't want to disturb people."
I was IMPRESSED.
CC
A little girl and her dad just sat down next to me. The dad opened a laptop so the little girl could play a game. I sighed internally as the beeps and whistles of the game began.
A moment later, the girl said, plain as day.
"Daddy, could you show me how to turn the sound down on this game? I don't want to disturb people."
I was IMPRESSED.
CC
A massage of words.
I had dinner with an extrovert yesterday.
It started out with drinks, then dinner, then she gave me a ride home. At the beginning, I did what I always do when I'm in an introverted mood. I subtly let her don most of the talking, asking questions that begged for long answers, basking in the feeling of sitting there, munching on cheese and drinking wine and letting her words rush over me in great waves of feeling and enthusiasm.
I heard about our mutual friends, and her lover, and her job and her roommate and her big Puerto Rican family. Actually, I met several members of said big Puerto Rican family since her Uncle owned the restaurant. They would flounce up to the table and there would be hugging, cheek-kissing and an icy wave of Spanish that washed over me, leaving me confused but absolutely awake.
Happy families usually depress me, but this one did not.
She knew the menu intimately, so I let her order for me and ended up with an oddly but wonderfully smooth gazpacho, a dish of red snapper in a creamy, spicy sauce, and an unusual but wonderful take on the banana split for dessert with fried bananas and a piquant caramel sauce. (Suffice to say, the restaurant's cultural appropriation of this classically American dish into a Puerto Rican version was something I was totally in right relations with.)
Somewhere between the two mojtios and the glass of port, I warmed to the conversation and she started to ask me questions, questions that would have been somewhat intrusive in a lesser conversation over a lesser meal.
"How long have you and theCSO been together?"
"A little under eight years, though we broke up once overnight and once for a week."
"Why? I mean, if you don't mind me asking?"
Her eyes were curious about the human condition, or perhaps the workings of my head, but there was no malice or voyeurism there. I gave her a brief answer, not a sufficient one, but I'm fairly certain one cannot understand the workings of another's relationship anyway.
We talked more and the river of conversation flowed on and I felt myself beginning to feel better about the world. She asked me more and I answered her and I found myself opening up, laying out the difficulties of my life like cards on a table.
She listened and she asked and we talked and I asked and looked at each other with serious expressions full of concern as if by hearing one another's difficulties we were doing serious business, like little children carrying fire. I'm not a person who touches, but I found myself touching and talking and putting aside something of my WASPy reserve.
I thought of how when my grandmother was in the hospital and required 24-7 babysitting, I would stumble past the "intensive care" sign and passionately wish somebody would care for me intensively, pack me away in bed, bring me scrambled eggs and read to me from an intense novel.
A few people in my life have been able to care for one intensely. Fewer still have been able to keep it up past the first flush of knowing someone new.
So, anyway, Sarah-the-Extrovert is likely to appear on this blog again.
CC
It started out with drinks, then dinner, then she gave me a ride home. At the beginning, I did what I always do when I'm in an introverted mood. I subtly let her don most of the talking, asking questions that begged for long answers, basking in the feeling of sitting there, munching on cheese and drinking wine and letting her words rush over me in great waves of feeling and enthusiasm.
I heard about our mutual friends, and her lover, and her job and her roommate and her big Puerto Rican family. Actually, I met several members of said big Puerto Rican family since her Uncle owned the restaurant. They would flounce up to the table and there would be hugging, cheek-kissing and an icy wave of Spanish that washed over me, leaving me confused but absolutely awake.
Happy families usually depress me, but this one did not.
She knew the menu intimately, so I let her order for me and ended up with an oddly but wonderfully smooth gazpacho, a dish of red snapper in a creamy, spicy sauce, and an unusual but wonderful take on the banana split for dessert with fried bananas and a piquant caramel sauce. (Suffice to say, the restaurant's cultural appropriation of this classically American dish into a Puerto Rican version was something I was totally in right relations with.)
Somewhere between the two mojtios and the glass of port, I warmed to the conversation and she started to ask me questions, questions that would have been somewhat intrusive in a lesser conversation over a lesser meal.
"How long have you and theCSO been together?"
"A little under eight years, though we broke up once overnight and once for a week."
"Why? I mean, if you don't mind me asking?"
Her eyes were curious about the human condition, or perhaps the workings of my head, but there was no malice or voyeurism there. I gave her a brief answer, not a sufficient one, but I'm fairly certain one cannot understand the workings of another's relationship anyway.
We talked more and the river of conversation flowed on and I felt myself beginning to feel better about the world. She asked me more and I answered her and I found myself opening up, laying out the difficulties of my life like cards on a table.
She listened and she asked and we talked and I asked and looked at each other with serious expressions full of concern as if by hearing one another's difficulties we were doing serious business, like little children carrying fire. I'm not a person who touches, but I found myself touching and talking and putting aside something of my WASPy reserve.
I thought of how when my grandmother was in the hospital and required 24-7 babysitting, I would stumble past the "intensive care" sign and passionately wish somebody would care for me intensively, pack me away in bed, bring me scrambled eggs and read to me from an intense novel.
A few people in my life have been able to care for one intensely. Fewer still have been able to keep it up past the first flush of knowing someone new.
So, anyway, Sarah-the-Extrovert is likely to appear on this blog again.
CC
Monday, July 02, 2007
Response from Poly Friend re: Cocktail party invite
Since we are more of 'friends with benefits' than SO's of any flavor, probably not required.
If you wanted to be painfully correct, inviting Sarah would be appropriate, as she's essentially our third. however, as we don't all live in the same house (which is where i personally draw the lines for this sort of thing) it's not strictly necessary.
thanks for asking: )
So there we have it.
I still ordered Steve's book, though.
CC
If you wanted to be painfully correct, inviting Sarah would be appropriate, as she's essentially our third. however, as we don't all live in the same house (which is where i personally draw the lines for this sort of thing) it's not strictly necessary.
thanks for asking: )
So there we have it.
I still ordered Steve's book, though.
CC
Sunday, July 01, 2007
More on key parties and polyamory
Since Louise has called me on this:
Sex can produce kids. And can transmit disease. And it often produces emotional connections that are painful to break, or at least immensely complicating to one's life.
I realize that I'm stating the obvious, but to me those are important points.
I do have a bias toward not sleeping with someone you wouldn't breed from and making sure as many kids as possible are born in stable situations.
So yeah, I'm not totally in love with the key party concept, thought I am pretty hip to consenting adults doing what they want.
I'm more OK with it now than I would have been in the 1970's, when I would have wondered to what degree some of the women really were consenting given the societal position of women at the time.
And yeah, even among sexual diagrams more complicated than my own, I have a bias toward commitment and stability. Key parties did break up quite a few marriages.
That said, I'm analyzing my own thinking on the cocktail party and I've gotten it down to two main points.
1. When I was a little more free with my own favors, I would have found it quite odd if someone thought they had to include anyone I might be sleeping with at the time in a social gathering they invited me to. To me the obvious thing to do would be to ask my friend what the ettiquette is as far as she was concerned.
2. The polyamory thing I'm used to. She's my friend. It's the ummm...elf thing. Anybody curious can write me a private email and I will send you the guy's website.
Suffice to say, the front page includes the quote:
Elven currents strike me as not being particularly of an object, but the spaces BETWEEN objects. Not the emitter of forces...but the area of interplay between forces...so much so that one could think of that space between being it's own force..
So he's an elf. And, I think, a postmodernist because postmodernists are the only people I know who talk like that.
Oh, and later in the page he describes himself as an "3lf," with no apparent irony.
Postmodernist elf who uses leetspeak.
Sigh.
I'll likely invite him anyway.
CC
Sex can produce kids. And can transmit disease. And it often produces emotional connections that are painful to break, or at least immensely complicating to one's life.
I realize that I'm stating the obvious, but to me those are important points.
I do have a bias toward not sleeping with someone you wouldn't breed from and making sure as many kids as possible are born in stable situations.
So yeah, I'm not totally in love with the key party concept, thought I am pretty hip to consenting adults doing what they want.
I'm more OK with it now than I would have been in the 1970's, when I would have wondered to what degree some of the women really were consenting given the societal position of women at the time.
And yeah, even among sexual diagrams more complicated than my own, I have a bias toward commitment and stability. Key parties did break up quite a few marriages.
That said, I'm analyzing my own thinking on the cocktail party and I've gotten it down to two main points.
1. When I was a little more free with my own favors, I would have found it quite odd if someone thought they had to include anyone I might be sleeping with at the time in a social gathering they invited me to. To me the obvious thing to do would be to ask my friend what the ettiquette is as far as she was concerned.
2. The polyamory thing I'm used to. She's my friend. It's the ummm...elf thing. Anybody curious can write me a private email and I will send you the guy's website.
Suffice to say, the front page includes the quote:
Elven currents strike me as not being particularly of an object, but the spaces BETWEEN objects. Not the emitter of forces...but the area of interplay between forces...so much so that one could think of that space between being it's own force..
So he's an elf. And, I think, a postmodernist because postmodernists are the only people I know who talk like that.
Oh, and later in the page he describes himself as an "3lf," with no apparent irony.
Postmodernist elf who uses leetspeak.
Sigh.
I'll likely invite him anyway.
CC
He may be a UU at heart after all
In two weeks, we're throwing a little retro-50's cocktail party for my birthday. TheCSO and I were discussing it, and somehow the question of what we would do next year came up.
I said "Well, we could always go all 1970's and have a key party?"
"What's that?" he asked.
"Well..." I said, delighted that for once I possesed degenerate knowledge that he lacked, a reversal of the usual order of things. "I was totally kidding. It's a really tacky-middle class swinger party. The men all put their keys in a bowl and each woman takes a set of keys. Then the women go off and have sex with the men whose keys they've taken. It's very 1970's"
"Hmmm..." TheCSO said thoughtfully. "Sounds awfully heteronormative."
CC
I said "Well, we could always go all 1970's and have a key party?"
"What's that?" he asked.
"Well..." I said, delighted that for once I possesed degenerate knowledge that he lacked, a reversal of the usual order of things. "I was totally kidding. It's a really tacky-middle class swinger party. The men all put their keys in a bowl and each woman takes a set of keys. Then the women go off and have sex with the men whose keys they've taken. It's very 1970's"
"Hmmm..." TheCSO said thoughtfully. "Sounds awfully heteronormative."
CC
I don't recall Miss Manners addressing this one.
I'm having a cocktail party and inviting a polyamorous friend. I'm inviting her legal husband, whom I barely know but he is her husband. He has a lover that they seem to hang out with all the time whom I went to high school with, so I invited her.
My friend has another lover who, judging from his livejournal page, is oddly obsessed with elves. He's "otherkin" if you know what that means. I don't know the guy and have trouble believing he would gel with the rest of my friends, though that may be my own speciesism against elves showing.
I realize that when one invites people to a party, one is supposed to invite their significant others.
But goodness...
CC
My friend has another lover who, judging from his livejournal page, is oddly obsessed with elves. He's "otherkin" if you know what that means. I don't know the guy and have trouble believing he would gel with the rest of my friends, though that may be my own speciesism against elves showing.
I realize that when one invites people to a party, one is supposed to invite their significant others.
But goodness...
CC
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