Hrmm. Well, it's another point the the "blog anonymously" debate...
Personally, I'm in the camp that is really appalled at the writer for doing this. I have an interaction in my own life where I feel like someone wants to feel bonded with me, but not really invest the time and attention it would take to actually bond with me. It sucks and if I were to write about our interaction here frequently and she read it and saw herself, it would no doubt infuriate her. (Though thankfully I don't know her from work.)
This lady wanted a lot of things emotionally out of her nanny and seems bizarrely upset that the nanny viewed her work as, well, work. (That having been said, I would never complain about my job in an extended and serious way on my blog.)
It seems clear to me that validating the mother's ego is not part of a nanny's job. But maybe unofficially it always has been.
As I've mentioned before, I'm no stranger to inadvertantly displaying unnattractive qualities on the internet. But that a writer could write this peice and not see (a) that she herself was now writing about the nanny, except to millions more people and (b) that the tools to psychoanalyze her all over it seems a shocking lack of self-understanding.
Ps. This post has changed extensively since Michelle commented on it. But I think her comments still stand.