Monday, December 25, 2006

People who can't see themselves.

I was once having a conversation with a woman who was literally the most obnoxious woman I knew at the time. She had an impressive job, was well-respected in her field, active in her local church. She did a ton for charity and threw great parties in her large house.

But jeezum crow she was annoying and overbearing.

One time, she and I were talking about our minister.

"Oh, I think she's great," Obnoxious woman said. "But she's her own worst enemy sometimes."

"Well, aren't we all our own worst enemies?" CC asked.

"Why, no, I'm not my own worst enemy at all!" Obnoxious woman responded.

I was flat out amazed that she could have so little insight into herself. Of course, now that I think about it, the most obnoxious person I know now I think would also say that he isn't his own worst enemy. The second most obnoxious person I know right now would say that, too.

Perhaps there's something to that. We could call it the "Chalicechick Test for Obnoxiousness."

Do you pass?



Lilylou said...

Yikes, CC, I don't know if it means I pass or not, but I know for sure that there are people who consider me quite obnoxious and overbearing. And I do know that I can be a bulldozer sometimes when I get an idea in mind. It simply doesn't occur to me that anyone would object to my great idea.

I felt badly last night at the Christmas Eve service (I guess it's confession time) when I embarrassed the pianist by suggesting in the service that the guitarist accompany Silent Night, without consulting her first. It simply hadn't occurred to me that it might embarrass her.

I apologized all over the place afterwards when I experienced her frosty "I wish you had told me in advance" and she immediately forgave me, but I know she was hurt and I felt terrible.

I know I'm annoying and overbearing sometimes and I try to balance that with being patient with those who annoy and bulldoze me, at least whenever I remember how annoying and overbearing I am personally! Good Lord, it's tricky being a decent human being, ain't it?

Chalicechick said...

I guess what I meant as the "Chalicechick test for obnoxiousness" was:

"Do you recognize that sometimes, you are your own worst enemy?"

Sounds like you do, so you pass!


Joel Monka said...

I'm well aware that I'm ofttimes my own worst enemy, but as for being obnoxious- heck, that's one of my good traits!

LaReinaCobre said...

I am definitely my own worst enemy, but I'm not obnoxious. If I want something done my way and don't get it right away, I tend to become petulant and withdrawn. I realize this is because I've spent most of my life believing that all conflict was bad.

Now I'm trying to teach myself to say what's on my mind with less fear, and to learn how to ask for what I want, and challenge others as necessary in a straightforward way.

I don't know which is worse - being overbearing or being passive aggressive. They're both pretty awful.

Anonymous said...

Well, I'm always much more judgemental of myself than of others, so I guess that means I think I am frequently my own worst enemy. Maybe less so as I get older.
One of the secrets of life is that you really do get better as you get older.... (or maybe only those of us who pass your test -- the ones who never question themselves may get worse instead of better?)(or maybe it just looks worse on someone old enough to know better?)

Anonymous said...

Rather than being my own worst enemy, it's more fair to say that I'm my own toughest critic.

indrax said...

I'm not fond of the terminology, because I think that self blame is as overrated as self glorification, But at this point I'd say I am my only enemy.

Robin Edgar said...

Looks to me like you have a small handful of enemies here indrax and as a direct result of behaviour that they consider to be obnoxious and overbearing. . . I presume that's what they mean when they refer to "wild*ass statements" and such. . . Personally I like this quote even if it does come from a cowardly anonyous blogger. . .

What a tool. Indrax thinks he's some kind of idiot savant. He's half right.

Laptop computer - $1500
Unlimited high-Speed Internet access - $40 per month
Speaking truth to U*Us - Priceless

So just who are these obnoxious people you have the misfortune to know CC? I bet their not half as obnoxious as some of the obnoxious U*Us I know, unless of course they are the obnoxious U*Us I know. . . ;-)

Robin Edgar said...

My sincerest apologies for the typos and/or spelling errors . . .

Robin Edgar said...

BTW Everybody is their own worst enemy *sometimes*. . .