Sunday, October 29, 2006

The Voices In Our Heads

I am the voice in my ex-boyfriend's head. He mentioned this to me the other night in front of some of our friends, so I'm guess it's not really a secret. In his dreams, I sometimes show up to provide exposition and/or explain the situation. When awake, I provide commentary and advise him.

I'm guessing that's flattering, though I'm not 100 percent certain.*

The really disturbing thing is that I know what he means. Occasionally, the voice of someone whom is respect will spring unbidden to the forefront of my imagination when I have an important decision to make. Often for me, that voice is Katy-the-Wise.

Sometimes the voice isn't literally a voice. I noticed at one point that I was frequently threatening myself with cosmetology school if I didn't do a good job on my LSAT. I didn't literally believe that a chair at "Connie DiPodesta's House of Class" was in my future, but threatening myself with that was a reflex when I felt I needed spur myself on. It took me a long time to make the connection that my father had made the same threat whenever I got a bad grade in school.

So I'm curious, do y'all hear voices from the past still advising you? Do you trust them? Is there a significance to which voices you hear?

CC


*One time, I came back from college to visit my hometown and went out with favorite ex-boyfriend and some of his pals. We stopped for gas and he got out of the SUV to pump. "How do you know Charlie?" one of the guys asked from the back seat.

"He and I dated off and on for a few years." I responded.

"Nah, that can't be true"

"Umm...Yeah? It sure is." I said.

"But he only dates stupid girls."

Charlie got back in the car. "Charlie," I said. "I hear you only date stupid girls?"

"Is it in spite of her?" The guy from the back asked.

Charlie turned around to look at him. "It's BECAUSE of her."

4 comments:

PG said...

Irrelevant except that Charlie's other girlfriends probably wouldn't get this suggestion: I read a review of a book critiquing string theory that somehow seemed like the kind of thing you might like.

I don't think I have any voices in my head except my own, but the idea of having the voice of someone you respect spring into your mind reminds me of a book in which a minister hears God in different voices, including that of Oprah.

PG said...

One more suggestion: I'd be curious to know what you think of Rev. Matt Tittle's blog for the Houston Chronicle -- I was quite surprised to see a religion blog by someone who's an atheist.

Jamie Goodwin said...

You know I dig ya CC but I feel like I should say... careful your educationism is showing.

Chalicechick said...

There's an "ISM" for that?

CC