Garrison Keillor: The Rant Continues

PB mentioned in the comments of my last Garrison Keillor post that GK had written a nice essay on Unitarian Women saying we were the hottest in the world*. Trying to keep an open mind, but mostly hoping that the logic was more interesting than "they'll do the freaky stuff the Lutheran girls won't," I googled around for it, but couldn't find it.

I did, however, find this, another blog complaining about Keillor. My issues with Keillor are primarily that he is litigious and not funny.
The other blog cites concerns that he has little respect for atheists, which isn't unusual among people with Keillor's sort of outlook and doesn't bother me much. The blog, however, quotes Keillor as follows on the issue of gay marriage:

I favor marriage between people whose body parts are not similar. I’m sorry, but same-sex marriage seems timid, an attempt to save on wardrobe and accessories. Marrying somebody from your team. Still, it’s probably good for them to have to fight for the right to marry. My parents eloped against strong opposition from both families and they were in love for the rest of their lives and held hands and were tender on into their 80s. Of course they always had fresh strawberries.

Yeah, that's it, Garrison. Gay marriage is all about the wardrobe and accessories. Men and women are different "teams."

Oh, and searching for articles by Keillor on sexiness also brought me to this gem from Salon.

Women get broody sometimes and want to sit in front of a fire with a glass of merlot and discuss The Relationship, which is never a good idea. You know this. If you were captured by Unitarian terrorists and sat on by a fat lady and told that you absolutely must discuss your relationship, you should say no, no, no.

Awhile ago, Linguist Friend told me about something his ex-wife had once said, and I recall responding that it was a measure of her rhetorical skill that she could say something so brief that was irritating on so many levels. She may have competition in Keillor.

Again, as I wrote in the comments on my last GK post there's something about his very-scripted-sounding style of humor that makes me imagine him delivering one of his treasured bon mots that he'd stayed up late the night before planning, then leaning back, grinning slightly and nodding his head as he waits for my appreciative chuckle.

Which isn't coming.

I do want to see the essay where he actually mentions Unitarians without being rude about us, but I don't think hearing that he thinks we're sexy can save my opinion of him.

CC

*Personally, I'm partial to the explanation offered by British Novelist Jilly Cooper for why upper-middle class intellectual types have the most fun in bed--because when they are curious about something, they read up on it and learn a lot about it and because they tend to be tall and can reach the dirty books the librarians put on high shelves.