1. How high a standard to set for other people's behavior, particularly in regards to me. I don't want to be a whiny bitch who demands that other people take care of her. I fear being a high-maintenence person like the plague. But I am cognizant that sometimes people treat me badly and I just put up with it because I honestly have no clue how else to respond. I really, fundamentally, do not expect people to change. I can suggest ways they could improve their behavior, and sometimes do with gusto, but I pretty much accept people in my life as they are and assume they won't change. When they become more trouble than they're worth, I quietly let them go.
And I get that when I let a few people's bad behavior put me in a depressed mood, I become hard to be around for everyone. (If you get depressed and don't understand that you are rather difficult to be around when you are in that state, I highly recommend the end of Buffy the Vampire Slayer season two and the beginning of season three. I love Buffy and those episodes are for me damn near unwatchable as I find her sadness over losing Angel brings the entire cast down. I didn't completely get how powerful one sad person could be until I saw them.)
2. I had a crisis-based childhood. Everything, budgeting, time management, parental attention was always focused around who was the biggest mess, who needed it the most. At the time, I basically dropped out of the competition and let my brothers compete for who could be the biggest screwup. That cost me some things that I am discovering now that I could have used, but I'm a lot better off than they are, to put it mildly.
But now I find I am repeating some of the same patterns. Not to the degree my parents did, but I do have a tendency to let things slide until they force me to deal with them. I want to stop. I have some plans for fixing my own life and making things run more smoothly, yet crises are still popping up and part of me still goes "Oooh! Aaah! A crisis! Wahoo! I know what to do now!"
Sometimes I think I'm really good at improving things that suck, but I have no idea how to get things past "OK" into "good" or even "Wonderful."
Anyway, that's me, being all introspective. Comments welcome.